By Annie Barrett
January 07, 2014 at 09:00 AM EST
type
  • TV Show
Network
Genre

What would you want your “occupation” chyron to say if you were on The Bachelor? (Just go with it.)

I’d be fine with “Beach Stroller,” “Cheese Whisperer,” or “TV Recapper,” all of which are true depending on the hour. If we’re going for every-second-of-every-day accuracy, though? “Bum.”

Here are the most creative job titles of The Bachelor: Juan Pabs premiere (read our full recap here):

Dog Lover

Michael Becker

WHO? WHO PAYS YOU TO LOVE DOGS?

Free Spirit

From a Wealthy Neighborhood

Former NBA Dancer

Goes to a Lot of Castings

Massage Therapist

Nut!

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images

No idea, but her bra isn’t as good as she is at her job, and she looks like Christine Taylor here.

Mineral Coordinator

Chuck Hodes/Fox

If you say so….

ABC/Nicole WIlder

We have confirmation from Hank.

Juan Pablo, 25, “Sports and Entertainment Consultant”/”Lifeguard”

Sean Lowe, older man, “Therapist”

Read Kristen Baldwin’s hilarious recap of the premiere here!

Episode Recaps

Chris Harrison hosts the romance reality competition series in which a gaggle of women vie for the Bachelor’s heart — and a wedding proposal. Will you accept this rose?
type
  • TV Show
seasons
  • 23
episodes
  • 232
Genre
Premiere
  • 03/25/02
creator
Performers
Network
Complete Coverage
Available For Streaming On
Advertisement

Comments

EDIT POST