By Jennifer Arellano
Updated November 21, 2013 at 05:21 PM EST
Credit: Jeffrey R. Staab/CBS

Oh David Letterman, for a man who has shunned the social media dominance of his younger late night peers, your antics with America’s bestie last night have made you an unwitting viral candidate.

And how is that? Two words. Jennifer Lawrence. Read on for a chronicle of her best moments on Wednesday night’s Late Show.

The curmudgeonly host was left speechless several times during the Hunger Games goddess’ visit, as she went on about her TMI gastrointestinal problems, how her Hunger Games co-star Woody Harrelson made her crap her pants, and her need for someone to hold her (surely someone will volunteer). But it was Letterman who also left us speechless when he joined a shivering J.Law underneath a fluffy pink blanket and then proceeded to “fix” her newly shorn hair. “Do you ever get so cold that you start sweating? Is that just a gross problem I have?” said Lawrence. “No,” answered Letterman, “I didn’t know that it was possible for the human anatomy to behave that way.” After complaining of being cold, a gentleman named “Pat” brought Lawrence a bubblegum pink comforter. Adorableness aside, was anyone else slightly creeped out when Letterman starting cloaking himself with J.Law’s blankie? What ever were they doing under there? And then he touched the hair (at 2:46). The hair! Watch below:

But the fun didn’t stop there. Lawrence recounted her last ER visit when her stomach problems when awry: “I had an ulcer, but it turns out I had a fulcer,” she said. We don’t know what that means, but you had us at Jennifer Lawrence. “You can only sh–t your pants so many times a day before you have to go to the emergency room,” she casually shared to a tight-lipped Letterman. Quotable goodness below:

What, did you think she’d run out of more fantastical things to say? Here she is sharing more of her gastrointestinal woes, this time involving a Haymitch Abernathy. “He was also the other reason I crapped my pants, weirdly,” she said of the “healthy” drink that Woody Harrelson had once given her.

And finally we learn that Lawrence is not surprisingly fond of the hand-shake greeting: “somebody, just hold me, you know?” Gladly.

Did we miss any more impossibly adorable J.Law moments? What else caught your eyes (and ears) during last night’s Late Show?

Late Show With David Letterman

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