The Wolverine
Credit: Bob Mahoney/The CW
When the Saints Go Marching In

I mean, honestly. Could this show get any hotter?! As if the Klaus and Marcel of it all wasn’t enough, now Tyler’s showing up and Elijah is rocking full on casual attire?! I’m talking jeans, people. Not even a suit jacket this week. Is it just me, or do normal people clothes really set off his cheekbones? Let’s get to it!

Kicking things off with a bang, Marcel was in the middle of hosting fight night, which is basically vampire fight club with a lot more candles. Two vamps beat the crap out of each other in the hopes of getting one step closer to a daylight ring and Marcel’s inner circle. First thing I love about these vampire shows? Men and women are of equal power, and it’s not at all strange to see them fight. Second thing I love? The fact that said woman can snap said man’s neck with her crotch legs. However, her girl power moment was short lived as soon as Klaus entered and snapped her neck the old-fashioned way (with his hands, obviously). Just like that, Marcel’s night of ultra-violence was taken over by a very angry pair of Original brothers.

Elijah made his way through the “colleciton of filthy amateurs” to threaten Marcel and everyone at the party if Marcel did not return Hayley. See, the thing was… he would if he could, but he couldn’t. Marcel didn’t take Hayley. So where was she? In the back of Tyler Lockwood’s truck — which reminded me of Mason Lockwood’s back in TVD season 2 days. Tyler, or the “backstabbing half-breed piece of sh–,” as Hayley identified him, had his hybrid face on (literally), and he did not have time to mess around. He took Hayley to a small cabin in the water, where he informed her that they were in the bayou. He’d dug up some information on Hayley’s family. Her crescent-shaped birthmark meant her family was royalty amongst the wolves, and now, this little village was all that was left thanks to vampire prosecution. So why bring her there? Well, Tyler had a plan, and it included stealing blood from Hayley’s stomach and attempting to turn fellow wolf Dwayne into a hybrid. Yeah, Tyler isn’t messing around anymore, guys. Also, I was in love with seeing Tyler’s familiar Vampire Diaries face in New Orleans. The crossover worked beautifully, and I think fully connecting those two worlds made the show even better. More where that came from, please!

But while Tyler asserted his aggression toward Hayley, Elijah was busy insulting Marcel’s troops. Newsflash, y’all: Elijah knows you can hear him, and great hair just don’t care. All he was worried about was finding Hayley, so Marcel offered up a witch to do a locator spell to help them track down their “lost sheep.” Good one, Marcel. On the road, Klaus was quick to comment on Elijah’s feelings for Hayley and his desperation to find the little wolf. He had just started in on the family patriarch speech when he caught scent of one Tyler Lockwood. What would he smell like? Sex and sweat?

Klaus found Tyler’s vehicle and finally gave Elijah the whole I-might-have-brutally-murdered-Tyler’s-mother back story. The best part? Elijah’s oh-so-amused face when Klaus went all alpha on him. Nothing is more belittling to Klaus’ power than Elijah’s smirk. Ugh, love that family patriarch.

With Klaus out of the way, Marcel finally confronted Josh on being Klaus’ spy. He then sent him off to meet Davina, who was going to wipe Klaus’ compulsion from his mind. It was going to be painful, but it meant Josh would then get to swap teams… not that that’s a good thing, but it was kind of his only option. These vamps run a hard bargain. However, I do have to say that the Davina-Josh bonding was touching. She was the super witch who wanted to be normal, and he was the gay kid who went from clubbing to vamping in no time. And now, they were just friends. Although I can’t imagine Marcel will be too happy when he finds out Davina didn’t erase herself from Josh’s memory. As precious as that pinky promise was, it’s none too comforting in the violent world you kids live in.

On the positive side of things, it might be a bit before Marcel figures it out, seeing as he spent the episode trying to win over his one-time love, Rebekah. He showed her that what had become the garden, the place where he keeps those who betray him, was once the foundation of the dream house he had planned for the two of them. And then he offered for her to join him in taking down Klaus. She clued him in to the fact that killing Klaus meant killing his entire bloodline, so he had another plan: Bury Klaus in the garden. Would it work? Eh, we’ll have to wait and see.

Let’s get back to crazy vengeful Tyler, who informed Hayley that he’d found a witch who had nightmares of Klaus using the baby to create an army of hybrids. Apparently, with the baby’s blood, hybrids didn’t need to drink the blood of the doppelganger to complete their transition. That being said, however, they also weren’t sired to Klaus. But instead, Dwayne seemed to be sired to Hayley, right up until Tyler ripped his heart out. Oh, and Hayley escaped to find Elijah in the woods. Or maybe he found her. All that matters is the sweet embrace they shared. That, and the fact that Tyler referred to Klaus as the “killer of men, women and puppies.”

Hayley told Elijah Tyler’s theory that Klaus knows about the baby’s blood and plans to build an army. And just like that (speak of the devil, right?), Tyler came face-to-face with his one-time sire. First things first, Klaus brought up Caroline, and the two began their all-out brawl — ’twas fight night all over again (so why were they wearing shirts?!). Before shoving his hand in Tyler’s chest, Klaus threw every insult he could think of: He brought up Tyler’s mother, and the fact that he was a disappointment. Tyler retaliated by hitting Klaus where it hurt with talk about being a failure himself. But enough with the insults, it was time for Klaus to end Tyler’s “tedious little life.”

Don’t freak out. After realizing that was exactly what Tyler wanted — this is where my heart breaks for Tyler — Klaus decided that death offered “more peace than you deserve.” He then compelled Tyler to live the rest of his days knowing that he was nothing to Klaus. Although I’m not sure what good that did considering Tyler went straight to Marcel with news of a hybrid baby and potential hybrid army. Needless to say, it was not music to Marcel’s sexy ears.

After learning of the twisted miracle baby, Elijah confronted Klaus about his (non-existent?) plan to make an army. Klaus, clearly hurt by the accusation, decided to play his role of being the lesser brother… the bastard. And so he bit Elijah. NOT COOL, KLAUS. He claimed the hallucinations and dementia were his parting gift considering the bite wouldn’t kill Elijah (though it should’ve healed). The best part of all of this? Elijah’s Klaus impression and him calling the bite a nuisance “like NiKlaus himself.” And in normal Elijah fashion, he immediately regretted condemning his brother. Hayley assured him we all do bad things — and apparently she did them in Cabo — but most of us die before our list gets “embarrassing.” Did someone say list? Because there’s a book outside the door that holds Hayley’s entire family tree. And according to a matching birthdate, her real name might be Andrea?

Back at the house, Klaus tried to get Rebekah on his side. But when she lied about Marcel’s knowledge of just about everything, it was pretty evident that she was seriously considering Marcel’s offer of burying Klaus for a lifetime of happiness. And now we have to wait two weeks to find out if Klaus really is in this alone and if Elijah’s going to get back in a suit anytime soon.

What do you guys think? Will Tyler leave before Klaus is defeated? I hope not, because quite frankly, this was my favorite Tyler story line yet. Plus, he’s so pretty. More importantly, will Rebekah finally turn her back on her bastard brother? Sound off in the comments below!

Episode Recaps

When the Saints Go Marching In
The Originals

Joseph Morgan and Daniel Gillies star as Klaus and Elijah Mikaelson in this Vampire Dairies spin-off about the first family of vampires, their life in New Orleans, and the witches and werewolves who live there.

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