October 17, 2013 at 11:32 PM EDT

I’m now picturing Syfy’s movie development process as an awesome drunken weekly beach party that climaxes with whoever won at beer pong reaching into a hat full of index cards with horror tropes written on them. They blindly select two cards, then read them aloud to the party and everybody cheers — that’s the new movie! Like these latest two that were just announced today. One is “Vampires” and “Ocean,” while the other is “Tornadoes” and “Rocks.”

In Beast of the Bering Sea, Cassie Scerbo (Sharknado) and Jonathan Lipnicki (Jerry Maguire) play a “sister and brother team prospecting for gold, who accidentally disturb a colony of blood-sucking amphibious predators (sea vampires) in an underwater cave.” Premieres Nov. 9.

In the second, Stonados, Paul Johanssen (One Tree Hill), William B. Davis (The X Files) and Thea Gill (Queer as Folk) star “in a disaster movie about a freak weather system which hurls deadly boulders.” Premieres Nov. 23.

But really, it just as easily could have been tornadoes hurling vampires.

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