By Annie Barrett
September 03, 2013 at 04:00 AM EDT
  • TV Show

It’s season 17 and I for one am still feeling aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive! Sort of. That’s a lot of i’s.

The Dancing With the Stars cast won’t be announced ’til Wednesday morning on Good Morning America (look for the complete list on’s Inside TV), but of course the rumors are spinning faster than Val Chmerkovkiy’s sparkly bolero in a shirtless Argentine tango.

ABC will not confirm any casting rumors, but as usual, TMZ has been busy reporting on them anyway. So who’s supposedly on board?

Valerie Harper would probably be the biggest story, as the star of Rhoda and The Mary Tyler Moore Show had been diagnosed with terminal brain cancer in January. Doctors say she may be nearing remission, but the idea of “dancing for your life” would be a huge deal. I’d trust DWTS to make her journey a celebration of life rather than a looming cloud of doom — but when contestants regularly drop out due to injury and suffer near-breakdowns due to emotional exhaustion, you have to wonder… is this wise?

I’d personally be most excited to see former Saved by the Bell stars Leah Remini (The King of Queens) and Elizabeth Berkley reunite on network TV. I’ve already started searching for evidence of dramatic struggles between Stacey Carosi and Jessie Spano, but you’d be surprised how little footage there is on YouTube of the Malibu Sands summer. (No, you wouldn’t.) Remini recently broke away from the Church of Scientology and should be eager to latch what will become a lifelong devotion to the Festivus of Fringe — which lasts 24-7 and is year-round if you really want to commit and have the right mentality about it.

I’ve started coming up with a collection of Showgirls moves Elizabeth Berkley should do on Dancing With the Stars… and I’m wondering if that famous shot of her licking the stripper pole would work best for the rumba or the marathon mambo. It’s going really well so far.

Also rumored for season 17: Glee‘s Amber Riley, NFL star Keyshawn Johnson, Christina Millian, Snooki, mother to us all, and a “yogurt spokesperson” — I’m hoping John Stamos but maybe DWTS super fan (and former Jennifer Grey supporter) Jamie Lee Curtis a.k.a. Enthusiastic Activia Lady (EAL) is more likely?

Again, NONE of this is official. But what do you think, so far?

I honestly never put much stock in DWTS casting because surprise dance ability and the camaraderie established a few weeks down the line are what will ultimately keep people tuning in. Still, this cast is pretty great, right? Remini vs. Berkley for the win?

Episode Recaps

  • TV Show
  • 28
  • 03/21/11
  • Richard Hopkins
Complete Coverage