Memorable lines from ''Glee,'' ''Grey's Anatomy,'' and more

By EW Staff
Updated November 16, 2012 at 05:00 AM EST

”So we cast a brunette as Sandy, and a guy as Rizzo. Who’s directing this — Julie Taymor?” —Artie (Kevin McHale), during a casting meeting for the musical Grease at William McKinley High School, on Glee

”I am not a spoon, I’m a knife — and I’m gonna stab you in the eyeball.” —Cristina (Sandra Oh) to herself, after her bedmate asks about cuddling positions, on Grey’s Anatomy

”My last barber hanged himself. And the one before that. Left me his scissors in his will.” —Abraham Lincoln (Daniel Day-Lewis), joking about his onetime tangled mess of hair, in Lincoln

”Now there’s just no chance for you and me/There’ll never be/And don’t it make you sad about it.” —A post-breakup Justin Bieber, covering Justin Timberlake’s ”Cry Me a River,” during a concert in Boston

”To hell with dignity. I’ll leave when the job is done.” —M (Judi Dench), after hearing news that she is being pushed aside at MI6, in Skyfall

”This calls not just for a reexamination of the drug war but an entire rerouting of my touring schedule.” —Bill Maher, on the legalization of marijuana in Colorado and Washington, on Real Time With Bill Maher

”I am a MILF now, okay? I am going to be the MILF of your child!” —Porn star Peeps (Ari Graynor), lamenting her pregnant state to her fellow porn star and husband Mandrew (Cheyenne Jackson), in Broadway’s The Performers

”I started the TeaPot party after I got busted for pot in Sierra Blanca, Texas. I thought, Hey, there’s a Tea Party, so why not a TeaPot party?” —Willie Nelson in his memoir Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die

Episode Recaps

The fourth season of Glee was full of ups and downs, but one consistent bright spot was Lea Michele's Rachel Berry, who stretched her wings…


Jane Lynch, Lea Michele, and high school anxiety star in Fox’s campy musical.

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