October 22, 2012 at 06:50 PM EDT

Have you ever felt like a hopeless dimwit? Is Encyclopedia Britannica just not cutting it for you? Do you want to win friends and influence people? Then you’d better pick up a copy of The Onion Book of Known Knowledge, out Oct. 23

But it’s too heavy, you say! I couldn’t possibly lift a tome so replete with knowledge all by my lonesome. Not to worry, there’s the Book Bjorn! This extremely fashionable carrier distributes the weight of the book across your back and puts it in easy reach so you can enjoy your copy of The Onion Book of Known Knowledge entirely hands-free! Check it out below:

Admit it, book lovers. You kind of want one.

Read more:

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