By Annie Barrett
October 02, 2012 at 12:00 PM EDT
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Blog Image Credit: Everett

Studies have shown that Hidden Gems of the Week, EW.com’s collection of reader-submitted ridiculata, is the best way to enjoy Dancing With the Stars without ever having to turn it on. It’s a visual feast of sparkles, fringe, and stunning awkwardness. Ready to go down the rabbit hole? Behold this bountiful smattering of Visible Gems!

MOST VALUABLE GEM (MVG) OF THE WEEK: 

Jason LaVeris/FilmMagic

“The longer I look at BBC’s dress, the more I start to see a face in the design…” —ktbanks, endorsed by gigi

“Is the face screaming, ‘How does that make you FEEL?!?'” —SpeechTeacher89

“A Munch mashup with that would be perfect!” —orville1970

“This MUST be already nominated, but….. does Brookebot’s dress remind anyone else of that roll-down female reproductive ‘map’ from high school Health Class? Or did I just age myself? :)” —JennieB

“Was it just me, or did Brooke look like she bedazzled an outline of her uterus on her dress?” —Physiology Fairy, endorsed by Fringe Fairy 

“Harold Wheeler gave us a wink at the beginning! A warm welcome to Planet Mirrorballus always warms my glittery little heart.” —Wiltasaurus, endorsed by Anthony

“Most definite ‘Hidden Gems’… ….The Harold Wheeler Orchestra ain’t wearing pants!!!!!!!” —LAG Award Winner

Dana Edelson/NBC

“Can we just talk about Blinged-Out Trombonist for a sec? As a former trombonist, I must day I don’t have a watch that big. Wah wah! (trombone sound)” —kellen

Acorn TV

“After Melissa and Tony went up to get their scores and Tom was doing his usual reminder to the viewers of how they can vote, he briefly tugged his earlobe. It was probably nothing, but I took it as an unconscious desire to be gem-nominated. Yes, Tom, anything you do is gem-worthy!” —Wiltasaurus, endorsed by LAG Award Winner

“Tom struck a pose when they came back from commercial break before introducing Bristol (that was for us, right Tom?). To me he looked like he was trying to be Spiderman shooting his web to reel in the camera!” —Jem H, endorsed by Kevin M. Kawa

“I don’t know if this is a hidden gem but my son noticed Mark had his holster on backwards.” —lostforever

Jeff Vespa/WireImage

“Sarah Palin is wearing a sparkly American Flag cuff bracelet!” —Trena Kos

NEXT PAGE: You can’t clap like that on television

https://instagram.com/justintimberlake/

“After Bristol & Mark danced, there was a shot of the celebquarium, with Kym’s Mirrorball Hat competing with the real Mirrorball Trophy for the shiniest thing in the skybox.” —Kevin

Matthew Murphy

“Helio’s precious daughter has a few gems on her shirt. She gets it!” —Lorie, endorsed by Wiltasaurus

pivot

“You could tell Apolo was going to get rave reviews when during one particularly cool kick-y section of the dance Carrie Ann had her arms raised hallelujah high and Bruno was giving a standing O already!  (on second viewing CA may have just been stretching.  But still)” —Jem H, endorsed by Queue55

“The dance floor looks like a Lite-Brite!” —DonnaW

“Apolo’s dance floor makes me want to pop some bubble wrap.” —Lorie

“Was that Pam Anderson’s trail of body glitter (as attested by Tom) on the ballroom floor during Apolo and Karina’s quickstep? I mean, what else could it have been?” —Wiltasaurus

Was Carrie Ann hiding a small animal under her Bump-it? —FridgedancerJAYBESDonnaW

“Is that a mirrorball ring on Carrie Ann’s finger?” —Scoobysnacks929

“What the heck does Carrie Ann have on her arm – a cell phone holder?” —johoallen

“The guy behind Carrie Ann in the Orville Reddenbacher bow tie. I thought I smelled popcorn…” —gigi

BOOM! Studios / Kat Leyh

“The love child of Cher and Morticia Addams appears to be sitting behind Bruno.” —DonnaW, endorsed by TracyR

BOOM! Studios / Jeremy Sorese

“During Tom’s intro before Sabrina and Louis took the stage, the stairs leading up to Brookebot Mountain had lights shining on them that made it look as though the stairs were weeping glittery plasma.” —Wiltasaurus

BOOM! Studios / Amber Rogers

“Nikita Khrushchev sitting directly behind Len, possibly planning some ballroom assassination with the ballroom’s ‘Umbrella Man,’ who ran out in the aisle and began crazily clapping behind Tom when Tom was introducing about Sabrina & Louis.” —Kevin M. Kawa, endorsed by WiltasaurusBVTracyRToots McG

“Not so sure that wasn’t the ‘Phantom of the Ballroom’ who randomly appears week after week, maddly clapping to see if he can bring down the chandelier.” —LAG Award Winner

CBS

“I believe ‘Lil Lachey is filling the gap left by Coco Arquette in the role of Lil Sparkalien Cheerleader!” —Scoobysnacks929, endorsed by orville1970daphne99

Drew and Helio’s daughters are like the yin and yang of young audience members. Drew’s daughter is giddy and Helio’s is very dour, especially when she was making an ‘oh’ face.” —daphne99

“I don’t know who the woman was that they showed after Carrie Ann talked to Sabrina, (sitting next to one of the Coco Arquette-wannabe adorable children whom I can’t place right now) but she had some seriously shiny shiny legs. And I don’t think it was nylons or anything. I’m all for shine and sparkle, but not so much on audience skin.” —Jem H

 NEXT PAGE: What can Maks’ suspenders do for you?

Thomas Niedermueller/Redferns via Getty Images

“Hidden Gem: the sparkles that Sabrina’s dress cast on the dance floor as they were getting their scores. It was like a Bat Signal from Planet Mirrorballus.” —Stee

“There was something extremely gem-like in the perfect outline of those suspenders around Maks’ behind. Why did he even have to wear the pants? Did I say that out loud?” —Christy Who Never Dances, endorsed by Scoobysnacks929 and iggy’s mother-in-law and wife

“Kirstie looks like Catherine Zeta-Jones in Chicago, but Maks looks like he’s about to go yachting…?” —Trena Kos

“Kirstie looked like Jo Anne Worley from Laugh In with that wig and dress.” —Beatrice, endorsed by Stee

“Kirstie Alley totally looks like Big Ang in that black wig…just sayin’. ‘Way to go Maksim!!’ *in my Big Ang voice*” —gigi

David Livingston/Getty Images

“Maks playing Kirstie’s butt like a drum while they ran up the stairs.” —Kevin M. Kawa

Lifetime

“Drew and Anna looked like they were dancing on the floor of a slaughterhouse-there was blood everywhere.” —daphne99

David M. Russell/CBS

“Does the mirrorball trophy now light up?!?! Awesome if it’s true & not just an effect” —JAYBES

“Instead of pointing to Melissa and Shawn as they were cutting away for commercial, it appeared as if Giles was pointing to Shawn’s “gold medals” if you will.” —Liz

“It was not terribly ‘hidden’ but this felt like a gem to me. The super serious face that Joey put on when it was time to announce his scores made me laugh out loud! He’s my favorite to watch. You have to hand it to Joey for consistent entertainment value. And not Carson Kressley or Cloris Leachman style entertainment, either.” —emiperkins

“Lou Diamond Philips!  And his little girl is just *not* impressed with Mirrorballus.” —orville1970, endorsed by BV

“He belongs there simply because he has “Diamond” in his name.  It doesn’t get any gemmier than that.” —Jem H

NEXT PAGE: ……..and a Hoff!

“During Shawn and Derek’s dance, the floor looked like my favorite candy, DOTS!!!” —Liz, endorsed by Fringe Fairy (love the enthusiasm for Dots!)

“During Derek & Shawn’s scoring segment, up in the left hand corner is a woman doing a nice little “Hey look at me” dance… until a DWTS staffer comes along and shuts her down. Oh to be her. Let your freak flag fly, Wavy Dancer! I saw ya! Fly on!!” —debbsjo, endorsed by CindyKay

Michael N. Todaro/Getty Images; Ray Tamarra/Getty Images

“‘VK’ in rhinestones on Val’s tie!” —johoallen, endorsed by SteeJem H

“The little crown on Val’s shirt looked like he spilled a little soup during lunch.” —daphne99

“Carrie Ann almost calling Val Maks — you could see he was pissed” –Fridgedancer

Tony Rivetti/ABC

“So, the ‘Dance Doctor’ uses a spare chair leg to roll out Gilles thigh muscle like cookie dough?” —SpeechTeacher89, endorsed by Wiltasaurus

“Was it me or did the audience in the studio laugh when it looked like Gilles Marini was getting probed during his clip package. Probe. Package. That sentence is a doozy.” —Anthony

ABC

“Joey mouthing ‘He’s so hot!’ behind Gilles.” —johoallen, endorsed by LAG Award WinnerFirst-Time Gem Hunter

“Peta’s outfit is really bugging me. Her whole look reminds me of a Bidoof. Seriously, look it up. It’s an annoying beaver-like Pokemon. Something about those colors swishing around…ew.” —CindyKay

“Peta looks like Liz in Strictly Ballroom. Oh that hair.” —Sat, endorsed by pylgrym

“I see a croissant everytime they do a close-up of Peta.” —Susie

“Gilles’ costume–the only thing going through my head right now is….”Khaaaaaaan!”” —orville1970, endorsed by johoallen

Patrick McElhenney/Fox

“Saddest thing about ‘The Season of the Half Paddle’ is that we may never hear Len say SEVEHHHHHHHHN :(” —iggy, endorsed by LizFringe Fairy

Sonja Flemming/CBS

“Is it just me, or is Louis looking very much like Michael Crawford on the CD cover of Michael Crawford performs Andrew Lloyd Webber tonight?” —Liz, endorsed by WiltasaurusMissKitty

LIFE-AFFIRMING GEM (LAG) OF THE WEEK: 

“Okay, if we’re going to keep this half-point scoring, can we at least petition for separate paddles with David Hasselhoff’s picture on them? Then they can hold up ‘Eight and a Hoff!'” —SpeechTeacher89, endorsed by johoallenFridgedancergigiorville1970DonnaWScoobysnacks929iggyBVDWTS ProdigalWiltasaurusElectronic_Neko

Thank you, DANCMSTRs one and all, for this fabulous gem heap!

XOXO,

Fringe Fairy

Follow @EWAnnieBarrett

Read more:

Week 2 performance recap: Where’s the Podium? 

Video reply time! Ask Annie anything about ‘DWTS’ — or whatever — below.

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