EW's summer-song awards

Official Song of Summer 2012: Carly Rae Jepsen ”Call Me Maybe”

Official 2012 Summer Jam (Narnia Edition): Of Monsters and Men ”Little Talks”

Best Summer 2012 Song That Actually Came Out in 2010: Ellie Goulding ”Lights”

Best Tribute to Out-Dated Technology: Maroon 5 ”Payphone”

Official Anthem for People who Hate the Beach (and Their Ex): Gotye ”Somebody That I Used to Know”

Best Beneficiary of Olympics Fever: Phillip Phillips ”Home”

Most Inescapable Cool-Kid BBQ Jam: Purity Ring ”Fineshrine”

Best Nine-Minute Epic About Egyptology: Frank Ocean ”Pyramids”

Best Witness Protection Program Jam: Rihanna ”Where Have You Been”

Best Possibly Non-Nautical Use of the Word Motorboatin’: Little Big Town ”Pontoon”

Best Definitely Non-Nautical Use of the Word Motorboatin’: A$AP Rocky ”Goldie”

Best One-Hit-Wonder Jinx Killer: fun. ”Some Nights”

Best Word-of-Mouth Hit That’s Actually about Word of Mouth: Neon Trees ”Everybody Talks”

Best Indie-Rock Vision Quest: Imagine Dragons ”It’s Time”

Best Appropriation of California Police Code: Dierks Bentley ”5-1-5-0”

Top Graduates of an Internet Search-Engine Ad: The Lumineers ”Ho Hey”

Top Graduates of an iPod Touch Ad: Grouplove ”Tongue Tied”

Best ”No, Seriously, Is This The One about Jake Gyllenhaal?” Smash: Taylor Swift ”We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”

Best Contribution from a Canadian Garage: Japandroids ”The House That Heaven Built”

Second-Best Song Featuring Carly Rae Jepsen: Owl City & Carly Rae Jepsen ”Good Time”

Best Single-Entendre Club Banger: Flo Rida ”Whistle”

Best Rap Posse Track: Kanye West et al. ”Mercy”

Best Rap Posse Track (Playground Snacktime Edition): Y.N.RichKids ”Hot Cheetos and Takis”

Best Proof that England has Summer Too: One Direction ”What Makes You Beautiful”

Best Bring-Your-Floaties Rap Jam: Kendrick Lamar ”Swimming Pools (Drank)”

Greatest Gift to the Fondue Industry: Justin Bieber ”Boyfriend”