By Annie Barrett
December 11, 2016 at 08:33 AM EST

It means you’re both hot (sans grill, ‘stache)…. and you’re both going to London! I mean, not that you weren’t ALREADY.

Men’s 200M Freestyle: Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte (pictured, pondering) qualified along with Ricky Berens and Conor Dwyer. Fifth and sixth-place finishers Matt McLean and Charlie Houchin will also go to London to flesh out the freestyle relays — but they’ll have to swim there, in shifts.

Did anyone else think Lochte touched the wall first? I could have sworn. This is one of the many reasons I am not Olympic (electronic wall) material.

Women’s 100M Backstroke: First-time Olympian Missy Franklin and Rachel Bootsma qualified, leaving two-time Olympic gold medalist and uber-cutie Natalie Coughlin in their wake. Missy set an American record for the backstroke and a Great Timing record for having just gotten her braces off a few months ago.

Men’s 100M Backstroke: Matt Grevers and Nick Thoman qualified. Dan and Rowdy clearly haven’t eaten the chip of encyclopedic knowledge re: either of these guys so we don’t learn much about them. Grevers’ 52.08 was the second-fastest time in history. “We weren’t ready to talk about Peirsol’s record going down!” Mmmm. Aaron Peirsol.

Women’s 100M Breast: Judy Greer lookalike Breeja Larson and Rebecca Soni qualified despite Soni’s “pedestrian finish.” Larson is another first-timer and the winner of tonight’s….


Larson’s post-swim look, which brilliantly combined the evening gown and swimwear portions of the competition, was very “Katniss at the opening ceremonies.” (Hidden gem: Girl’s on fire!)


Jessica Hardy right after Dan and Rowdy said she had not gone to Beijing because of a positive drug test.


Dan Hicks and Rowdy Gaines stand painfully close to one another when they’re alone, so naturally they threatened to smoosh Men’s 100M Breaststroke qualifier Brendan ‘Skarsgard’ Hansen.

Eventually Rowdy went in for the kill, leaving Hicks to seethe with jealousy so far, far away.


1. Do you ever just want to reach in and roll the backstrokers over?

2. Did Rowdy (or Dan)’s incredulous “Does she have enough steam in that 29-year-old body????!” re: Natalie Coughlin make you feel older and more decrepit than usual?

3. Would you single-cap, double-cap, or triple-mocha-capp it?

Follow @EWAnnieBarrett

Read more:

Night 2: Do all male swimmers look like Alexander Skarsgard?

U.S. Olympic swimming trials: Best and worst of Night 1

Olympic trials TV schedule: It’s time to care!