Credit: Jesse Cowell/My Damn Channel

Richard Harbaugh/Miss Universe Organization LP[/caption]

What a dilemma! Should I watch my beloved Joan Harris on Mad Men second guess her epic decision? Or should I try to figure out which Miss USA contestants have enough brain cells to second guess their evening gown decisions? Yes, overlapping with my favorite respectable show tonight is my favorite completely unrespectable show! This year, the Donald Trump-owned pageant show, hosted by Andy Cohen and Giuliana Rancic, features some fabulously entertaining (occasionally intentionally) contestants. You’ve got Miss Connecticut who “dreams of becoming the first tax accountant to be featured as a cover model for Oxygen magazine.” There’s Miss Pennsylvania, who holds the second highest degree of public speaking in Toastmasters International…yes, it’s always a shame when a good education isn’t completed. I already love Miss Alaska, who grew up in a log cabin, and Miss Florida who studied at the Gemological Institute of America (she can appraise the crown, Trump, so watch out!). Frankly, I’m just plain scared of Miss New Jersey. Should any of these lovely ladies make the top 15, they’ll earn the right to be judged by Cat Cora, Arsenio Hall, and Rob Kardashian in swimsuit, evening gown, and interview competitions. But the greatest potential for brilliance/hilarity/awkwardness/future youtube bonanzas lies with the interview questions that will be chosen from today’s tweets to #AskMissUSA. I’ve been obsessively checking every 2 minutes and so far my favorites include “Do you believe that competititve/all star cheerleading which has a squard in about every country and all of the USA a sport?” because who doesn’t love a question about pom poms? I’m also obsessed with, “If you become an animal, what animal do you want? And why?” Am I wrong or could a response to that question be, “As an animal I would want a rhino?” Ooh, but I also love “Cyprus has a major political problem since 1974 when Turkey had occupied 1/3 of Cyprus! If USA had that problem what u would do?” No doubt Joan Harris would nail that one.