The sixth season of 30 Rock has been all about the holidays. They’ve celebrated Martin Luther King Day, League of Women Voters Day, Leap Day, and last night we were treated to a St. Patrick’s Day celebration. Unsurprisingly, Elizabeth Lemon is not a fan of the Saint Patrick or his holiday. So when Dennis Duffy returned on her least-favorite holiday, Lemon was none too pleased. (Ed. note: How bizarre is it to see Dennis, and then cut to a commercial starring Mayhem, the Allstate guy? Worlds colliding!)
Liz was mostly worried that Dennis, the Terminator, would drive a wedge between her and Criss. But it turns out Dennis was actually so over Liz that he’d gone off and gotten married. The real problem between Liz and Criss was not Mr. Duffy. It was the fact that she couldn’t say “I love you” to Criss. But in a St. Patrick’s Day miracle, she put on the only green thing she owned — Hulk gloves — and her metaphorical big girl panties and told Criss she loved him. It sure is rewarding as a TV viewer when someone you’re invested in shows growth.
Meanwhile Tracy, who prays to Michael Jackson’s ghost, and Jenna, who prays to the Kabbalah monster, were fighting about who was the biggest star. None of this would have happened had it not been for Hazel the page’s poor planning. Her IQ of 70 is doing her no favors. And I have to say, I’m missing Kenneth at his page post. He’s the only one who can keep the peace between Tracy and Jenna, and oddly enough he’s not as creepy as Hazel is becoming.
And the great Jack Donaghy was feeling unworthy but found a way to boost his confidence in the form of Colonizers of Malaar. In the Risk-like game, Jack battled the writers — who were in the office to avoid getting punched in the face — for world domination. He easily succeeded because of his knowledge of basic macroeconomic principles and the worth of unicorn hair. He’s a jack of all trades, that one.
NEXT: The night’s best lines…
++ “Unfortunately, unless Harry’s Law really took off this week and no one told me, you two are the biggest stars at the network.” —Jack, talking to Tracy and Jenna about their parade hosting duties
++ Jenna: “We are total pros.”
Tracy: “On television and when it comes to the assisted suicide debate.”
++ “I’ll take care of Tracy and Jenna like they’re my own children, which is a bad example because I left my kids at a Sears in 2004.” —Hazel
++ “I will be wearing head-to-toe orange in honor of Protestant William of Orange. Inventor of the orange according to Yahoo Answers.” —Liz
++ “Well I’m sorry we can’t all belong to ethnic groups as beloved as the Germans.” —Jack
++ Tracy: “Siri kill Jenna!”
Siri: “I killed Jenna Elfman. Is that right?”
++ “If I’ve learned anything from reading Liddy’s princess books, unicorn hair has magical properties.” —Jack
++ “May your pornography be free of diarrhea.” —Liz’s German curse on Jack
++ “You missed the end of the lez movie. Their daughter? She goes off to college. And Mark Ruffalo? He’s just going to do his own thing at the restaurant.” —Dennis
++ Criss: “I just thought you were emotionally infantile.”
Liz: “I am. Me baby!”
++ “Liz, we need to talk. Open up a bag of wine.” —Dennis
++ “I’m sorry that I can’t just be a normal person and tell you stuff. Like nice stuff. Like greeting card stuff.” —Liz
What did you think of “St. Patrick’s Day?” What was your favorite line and moment? Sound off in the comments.