By Sandra Gonzalez
Updated December 19, 2011 at 09:37 PM EST
Korea News Service/AP Images

Kim Jong-il was a secretive man but his good friend General Aladeen gave us all a rare glimpse into the North Korean dictator’s private life today with a personal statement on the passing of his beloved badminton partner, released today via Huffington Post.

Well, it’s a fictitious glimpse.

The “statement” actually comes from Sacha Baron Cohen, who will portray Aladeen, a North African despot, in his upcoming comedy, The Dictator, out in May. And as fake as his words might be, you can’t help but (inappropriately?) chuckle.

Take a look at an excerpt below:

“I am saddened to learn of the passing of my dear friend Kim Jong-Il. Our thoughts go out to his wife and 813 children. “K-Jo” was a great leader, good friend and average double’s badminton partner. He died as he lived, in 3-inch lifts. An extraordinary man, he did so much to spread compassion, wisdom and uranium throughout the world.”

Aladeen concluded by welcoming Kim’s successor, Kim Jong-un, into the “Axis of Evil.” But I thought you had to pledge first?

Read more:

‘The Dictator’ trailer