A star with a Twitter account is every publicist’s nightmare and every pop culture junkie’s dream come true. That felt especially true in 2011, the year of the unfiltered celebrity tweeter. (We’re looking at you Ellen Barkin, Ashton Kutcher, and Charlie Sheen!) But which stars had the most entertaining — for better or for worse — Twitter feeds of the year? Is it Steve Martin, Seth Meyers, or Elizabeth Banks that deserves bragging rights for the best, thanks to their smart and silly musings? When it comes to the worst, does anyone come close to chronic over-sharers like Kim Kardashian and Courtney Stodden? Check out our rundown for the candidates for best and worst, then be sure to vote for your picks in the polls below and share who your pick is in the comments section.
Ellen Barkin (@ellenbarkin): Every now and then a celebrity comes along and discovers that Twitter is a place where they can unleash a torrent of crazy upon the world and, in turn, make us fall in love with the Internet all over again. (We owe you one, Kanye West.) There may not have been a greater Twitter newcomer in 2011 (or ever, for that matter) than Ellen Barkin, who ranted about everything from politicians (she had a choice nickname for Michele Bachmann) to numbers (“I hate even numbers”), and dropped more f-bombs than fellow freshman tweeter Samuel L. Jackson. Sample, if not quintessential, Barkin tweet: “Wow. Me and my big mouth. I guess I’ll try to find my filter now… Just kidding, muthaf—ahs. Suck it. If you don’t like it don’t read it.”
Alec Baldwin (RIP @alecbaldwin): Whether or not you agree with Baldwin’s politics, the 30 Rock star always had something interesting to say on Twitter. In fact, the very tweets about his now-infamous American Airlines incident ultimately prompted the actor to call it quits… for now. Sample tweet: “Flight attendant on American reamed me out 4 playing WORDS W FRIENDS while we sat at the gate, not moving. #nowonderamericaairisbankrupt.”
Steve Martin (@stevemartintogo): The comedic actor always posts funny tweets, but the best are always at expense of his pal and Twitter quitter Alec Baldwin. Sample tweets about Baldwin: “Now playing Words with Friends on playground slide. Been asked to turn it off by my teacher. Won’t. #neednewsheadline,” “Breaking news: Alec Baldwin takes up the 5-string banjo. I’m heartsick,” “Alec Baldwin might be about to break my SNL hosting record, but regarding International Bluegrass Music nominations, he’s behind 11-0.”
Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling): The Office star won our Most Entertaining Tweeter of the Year. Here’s a sampling of why: “It’s Xmas Eve, Chris Evans’ running to JFK trying to stop me (set to Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic). I’m at his apt the whole time,” “Bradley Cooper, stop asking Ed Helms to put us in touch with each other, I’m too busy with stuff,” “So where is the community chat room called “Holy S—, Did You See Breaking Bad?!” i’m there. I post in all caps.”
Elizabeth Banks (@elizabethbanks) Sample tweet: “Tonight I add ‘Emmy’ to the long list* of things I have never won. *Miss America, US Open, Olympic Medal, Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest, Tour de France, ASP Longboard, Amaze-U Clown School Best Balloonagoons, Hooter’s Hooters of the Year, Little League World Series, Hannah Montana Rock Princess Pageant, St. Bernadette’s Pancake Breakfast Raffle, Favorite child (given by my mom).” (Don’t worry, Elizabeth, maybe our readers will vote you Best Celebrity Twitterer of 2011!)
Damon Lindelof (@damonlindelof) Sample tweets: “SEX AND THE CITY creator is getting a divorce ’cause her husband cheated on her. That guy is gonna get SO voice-overed,” “I can’t wait to see BREAKING DAWN!!!! Wait. Yes I can. Forever,” “Nine million people watched Jersey Shore last night. Let’s RIDE, bitches — Fourth Horseman of the Apocalypse,””I have no shame whatsoever in admitting that I, like, totally want to be Ryan Gosling,” “Family Feud in the UK is called ‘Family Fortunes.’ A sad commentary on our warlike Americanness. That being said, OURS IS BETTER!!!”
Seth Meyers (@sethmeyers21) Sample tweets: “I feel bad for anyone who’s Halloween costume was Sexy Climate Change Denier. #Snowtober,” “Overheard at Cain headquarters this morning: ‘Where did you put that joke video?’ ‘JOKE video?!?,'” and in response to gay marriage being passed in New York, “In the last 10 minutes I’ve had 100 missed calls from Stefon.”
Stephen Colbert (@stephenathome) Sample tweets: “It’s the 40th anniversary of the release of Led Zeppelin 4. It’s #1 on my list of great rock albums that send listeners directly to hell,” “I’m sick of PETA whale activists. They already Freed Willy 3 times & in 2010 helped him Escape From Pirate’s Cove, albeit directly to video,” “McDonald’s is launching its own in-store TV channel. I can’t wait to watch ‘Hamburgling, She Wrote,'” “Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 9, 3. I’m not good with numbers.”
Andy Richter (@Andy_Richter) Sample tweets: “If you aren’t a Pacific Islander or Hulk Hogan, please do not call me ‘brother’.* (*actual siblings exempt),” “What? There’s a big thing I should be paying attention to? Okay. What now? It’s not so important anymore? Okay,” “Yesterday, I was asked to autograph the elevator at the Beacon. Today I saw that I misspelled my own name. #conanNYC.”
NEXT: The worst Twitter feeds of 2011….and Charlie Sheen. (Winning?)
Anthony Weiner: For obvious reasons. Well, one [insert size joke here] anyway.
Ashton Kutcher: (@aplusk) The former Twitter master fell from grace a few times this year, thanks to the cryptic posts he put up not long before his divorce from wife Demi Moore and his ill-timed Sunday Night Football tweet on the 10th anniversary of 9/11 (“This without a doubt the greatest day of the year! Hello football my old friend. Let’s us mingle for the next 5 months. TY #NFL TY #Jesus.”) But nothing made Kutcher more of a prime example of what not to do on Twitter than his knee-jerk reaction to the news of Penn State coach Joe Paterno’s firing. Before knowing the full extent of the story, Kutcher posted, “How do you fire Jo Pa? #insult #noclass as a hawkeye fan I find it in poor taste.” After a hailstorm of criticism, Kutcher handed over his Twitter account to his management.
Gilbert Gottfied: Speaking of getting in trouble on Twitter, the comedian was let go by Aflac after he sent out insensitive tweets about the tsunami in Japan, shortly after the tragedy. Some of the tasteless tweets that got Gottfried, who apologized later, fired from his voice-over gig? “I just split up with my girlfriend, but like the Japanese say, ‘They’ll be another one floating by any minute now,” “Japan is real advanced. They don’t go to the beach. The beach comes to them,” “I was talking to my Japanese real estate agent. I said ‘is there a school in this area.’ She said ‘not now, but just wait.'”
Courtney Stodden: (@courtneystodden) Just a heads up, much like this, you can’t un-see her tweets. “Secret Santa: Id love to lure you in by caressing my red lips up against your rosiness as my lustrous legs lie on top of your levitating lap,” “Experiencing such a wet ‘n wild afternoon by turning on a water hose and squirting it all over my heated flesh! Mmm feeling rejuvenated! XOs,” “”Psalm 139:14 “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Happy Sunday!”
John Cusack (@johncusack) Sample tweetzzzzz: “hello twittaverse.. i guess this isnt the most important tweet..” “does anyone else want to get blocked? i’m in the mood.. who would want someone that didnt want to be at the party– let me shuttle you away!”
Jim Carrey (@JimCarrey) Pretty much everything he does on the Internet these days weirds us out, tweets included. “#Boing an acronym. Bouncing On Inspiration’s Neverending Geyser, Believing Only In Natures Grace, to name a couple. Now U try ?;^),” “I’d rather be a lion that acts like a monkey than a monkey that acts like a lion. #Boing is fearless! ?B^P”
Russell Crowe (@russellcrowe) If you ever wanted to read someone’s workout routine, you’re in luck. “2 hr walk, 1 hr in the gym,” “Walk 60 mins Gym 60 mins Walk 20 mins ( Gym included Stat Bike,rower,body movement with weighted objects and bench super set)”, “Walk 1 hour, Yoga 50 mins. taller,wiser,more compassionate. just like that.” “38 km bike ride Temescal to Redondo.”
Hugh Hefner (@hughhefner) If you ever wanted to read someone’s TV-watching schedule, you’re in luck. “My girls & I watched an episode of ‘Dangerous Housewives’ & now I’m watching ‘The Daily Show’ & ‘The Colbert Report,'” “The guys & I watched Woody Allen’s ‘Everyone Says I Love You’ tonight,” “Tonight’s Mansion movie is Marlon Brando, Al Pacino & James Caan in Francis Ford Coppola’s masterpiece, ‘The Godfather.'”
Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian): It’s almost too perfect, really. “What did you guys think of my wedding? Can’t believe its all over! #KimKWedding”
BEST? WORST? WINNING?
Charlie Sheen (@CharlieSheen) In the midst of his tiger blood/winning/Goddess rampage, Sheen quickly became a Twitter phenomenon. In fact, his love-it-or-hate-it Twitter account set a Guinness World Record. Sample tweets: “Just got invited to do the Nancy Grace show… I’d rather go on a long road trip with Chuck Lorre in a ’75 Pacer….” “the title of my book has finally been delivered thru vast and extensive Lunar channels. ‘Apocalypse Me’ Warlock Latin for WINNING,” “Like a Dinosaur Stampede from middle earth RAGING atop Col. Kilgore’s main rotor, our assault must be EPIC. The Truth is our rocket fuel.”
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