In honor of Dec. 9's ''New Year's Eve'' — and last year's ''Valentine's Day'' — we offer seven movies for Garry Marshall to direct, complete with roles for his go-to actor, Hector Elizondo
Tagline Love can be as easy as one, two, tree
Two forest rangers (Chris Pine and Justin Timberlake) vie for a tough-but-sexy lumberjack (Evan Rachel Wood). Hector Elizondo plays an activist chained to a redwood.
Tagline When it comes to love, no one’s exempt
A lonely IRS auditor (Jessica Alba) realizes she has no dependents and sets out to audit every unmarried guy she can find, including a Ponzi schemer (Kyle Chandler). Hector Elizondo plays a lobbyist angling for a tax hike.
St. Patrick’s Day
Tagline Love is in the Eire
While visiting his uncle (Liam Neeson) in Dublin, a James Joyce scholar (James Marsden) meets a sassy barmaid who hates modern literature (Emma Stone). Hector Elizondo plays a tour guide at the Blarney Castle.
Tagline You’ve been Chosen
Ari Goldberg (Armie Hammer) is a young rabbi who has to get forgiveness from his ex-girlfriends before he can propose to his former shul-mate (Zoë Saldana). Hector Elizondo plays an irascible Hasidic Jew.
Tagline You’ll be emitting carbon dioxide — and laughter!
When his igloo is destroyed by climate change, an Inuit (Adam Sandler) is forced to move in with his nephew (Joe Jonas) at his frat house. Hector Elizondo plays the beleaguered college dean.
Tagline Love doesn’t follow party lines
A Republican congresswoman (Natalie Portman) falls for her Democratic challenger (James McAvoy) — and they end up voting for each other. A senator (Al Pacino) meets his constituents when his limo breaks down in a tough neighborhood. Hector Elizondo plays the funny, wise limo driver.
April Fool’s Day
Tagline Pranks for the memories
Eddie Murphy and Eddie Murphy star as neighbors determined to outprank each other, but an ex-con woman (Catherine Zeta-Jones) shows them that the joke’s on them. Hector Elizondo plays the puckish owner of a fake-dog-poop company.
New Year’s Eve star Abigail Breslin chips in
Tagline More than you bargained for
I play a crazed Black Friday shopper competing for a sale item with another shopper (Nat Wolff). In a tug-of-war, my wallet falls into his bag. While my best friend tries to tackle him, I jump on his back to reclaim the wallet he doesn’t know is in his bag. Security is called and we are both detained while we wait for our parents. The grouchy but tenderhearted security guard is played by Hector Elizondo. During our detainment we discover a passion for music and form the next big band. My dad (Daniel Day-Lewis) and Nat’s mother (Cate Blanchett) show up and sparks fly.