Heather Locklear calls of engagement, Jane Lynch confesses crush on Ron Howard, and more

By Dan Snierson
Updated November 25, 2011 at 05:00 AM EST

Jersey Shore

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Mad Men creator Matthew Weiner says he wants show to end in present day
”What is this Four Loko crap? I asked for four martinis!” sneers Don Draper. ”And what do you mean I can’t smoke a cigarette in this park? It’s outside. Also: Shut up, Pete.”

Former Melrose Place stars Heather Locklear, Jack Wagner call off engagement
They’ll be back together by February sweeps. May, tops.

Sofia Vergara says her ex-publicist told her to get breast reduction, but ”my mom was like, ‘God is going to punish you! You can’t cut your boobs!”’
Today, an old woman in Colombia will open the door to her home, look up, and see a plane writing in the sky: ”Always keep the faith, Mrs. Vergara! Love, America.”

James Bond’s Live and Let Die watch, which in the movie featured a buzz saw and bullet-deflecting magnet, auctioned for $198,000
Still not as cool as an iPhone 4S.

Jersey Shore‘s J-Woww blasts TSA for her additional search at Fargo, N.D., airport, calling it ”odd and deliberate”
Funny, that’s exactly how patrons at Karma describe the time she peed behind the bar.

On Late Night With Jimmy Fallon, Ron Howard gives Jane Lynch bouquet of roses after she confesses she had crush on him ”like every closeted lesbian in the 1970s”
They were only interested in him as a way to get to Mrs. C.

Kate Gosselin takes blogging gig at CouponCabin.com but says ”a talk show is possibly in my future”
Coming up next on Dr. Phil: ”When former reality stars are forced to face reality and take blogging gigs at CouponCabin.com!”

Regis signs off Live!, while Joy Behar’s HLN talk show will end next month
Trust me, this is huge news for your aunt. Call her and show her that you care.

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Jersey Shore

Follow Snooki, the Situation, Pauly, Ronnie, Sammi, Jwoww, Vinny, and Deena as they party, smush, and GTL
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