By Lanford Beard
November 01, 2011 at 03:15 PM EDT

We at EW scoured the TV line-up last night to find the best one-liners from your favorite shows. Last Monday’s Bite was from a very opinionated man on Dancing With the Stars, so it’s no surprise that this week’s performance episode provided another stand-out quote from the DWTS gang. A few funny fellows, courtesy of How I Met Your Mother and Two and a Half Men, also got in on the action. So how did backsides, sex tapes, and strippers find their way into EW’s Bite of the Night for Halloween 2011? Read on…

Want more? You can read all three recaps: See what Shaunna Murphy had to say about Two and a Half Men, read Annie Barrett’s Dancing With the Stars recap before she reveals her hidden gems, and see what Sandra Gonzalez made of Katie Holmes’s highly anticipated turn as the “slutty pumpkin” on How I Met Your Mother.

Read more:

EW’s Bite of the Night for Sunday, Oct. 30, 2011

EW’s Bite of the Night for Thursday, Oct. 27, 2011

EW’s Bite of the Night for Wednesday, Oct. 26, 2011