Credit: Ben Pruchnie/

Lady Gaga has a new album and a new duet partner — why not a new made-for-TV movie?

Sources tell EW that Lifetime plans to develop Fame Monster: The Lady Gaga Story, as originally reported by Deadline. Points for the title, Lifetime, but this unauthorized project sounds like a failure before takeoff. It’s based on the (unauthorized) book Poker Face: The Rise and Rise of Lady Gaga by New York Post scribe Maureen Callahan, and without Lady Gaga’s involvement, it’s likely the overcoming-obstacles montage is going to have nondescript pump-up music as opposed to, you know, one of her hits.

Now, Lifetime movies can go one of two ways: Either so bad it’s good (William and Kate) or so bad it’s horrific (pretty much everything else). Gaga clearly has an obsessively loyal fan base that’ll tune in out of curiosity, which I’m sure is what cable channel Lifetime is hoping.

There would be some obvious highlights: I’d be interested to see the Lifetime-sponsored script for the Gaga Gets Off Drugs/Reclaims Her Life scene. But, for the fans, isn’t most of her appeal her ah-maze-ing live performances? Without being able to relive her 2009 Star-is-Born VMA performance or her killer duet with Elton John at the Grammys, what is there to really watch? Drink every time someone says ‘Monster’? I can see it now: Plain Catholic schoolgirl is bullied and teased for being different. She goes off to NYU for a semester, then drops out to work on her music in the East Village. She loses her pants and does some drugs before getting a record deal. Along the way, she has a few bad romances and courts the paparazzi with her outrageous looks, all the while continuing to crank out hits and overcoming haters…

Okay. Actually, I’d probably watch that movie. Your move, Lifetime.

PopWatchers: Here’s the real question: If this madness happens, who do you want to see as Miss Stefani Germanotta?

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