By Erin Strecker
Updated October 03, 2011 at 12:00 PM EDT
Two And A Half Men
Credit: Adam Rose/CBS

Even after all the premiere buzz had passed, 20 million viewers stuck around last week to check out Ashton Kutcher’s second go-round in Two and a Half Men. The third episode tonight stayed pretty consistent with what’s been going on so far in the show’s ninth (!) season. If you’ve been loving Kutcher so far, tonight’s episode wasn’t going to change anything. For those who haven’t been impressed yet — well, you’re probably not going to be tuning in any more Monday nights.

Tonight’s plot centered around Alan taking up Walden’s offer to move in with him for “a couple of days.” As Berta warned Walden, “This guy [Alan] is like genital herpes…once you’ve got ’em, you got ’em for life.” Har, har. Same old, same old from Two and a Half Men. Tonight also featured Jake a fair amount, with him being dropped off by his mom, bonding with Walden over sandwiches, and becoming convinced that, like Walden, he’s flunking out of school because he’s “too smart.” The fact that Kutcher’s Walden can be described as “too smart” makes me laugh, but for all the wrong reasons. Although, Kutcher is reportedly advertising companies he has a stake in on the back of his prop laptop — as he did again tonight — so maybe he’s smarter than I give him credit for.

Alan, who always played second romantic fiddle to Charlie on the show, got his moment in the spotlight when Walden came to him for advice about how to win his ex-wife Bridget (the always-fantastic Judy Greer) back. And Charlie Harper wasn’t totally forgotten, as Alan and Co. made a couple of quips about him passing out with tattooed prostitutes, being a horrible role model, etc.

The real shocker came at the end of the episode when a heartbroken Walden told Alan’s ex-wife, Judith, that he was in love with Bridget. The hot, nearly always shirtless Kutcher was so brokenhearted and vulnerable. Cut to: Judith and Walden making out on the couch, with Jake taking photos in the background. Hello, blackmail!

PopWatchers: Finding Kutcher charming and/or hot? Will you continue to watch, or, like Charlie, have you moved on?

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Episode Recaps

Two and a Half Men | Monday, 8-8:30 p.m., CBS The warlock has left the building. With the spectacular, bridge-burning, jumping-down-?the-inflatable-?emergency-slide exit of Charlie Sheen from Two and a Half Men…

Two and a Half Men

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