1. will.i.am denies Black Eyed Peas are splitting after Kanye West declares, ”Rest in peace to the Black Eyed Peas, you’re gonna be missed”
So, Kanye has graduated from not letting people start to saying they’re finished?
2. Disgraced pastor Ted Haggard and Gary Busey to trade spouses on Celebrity Wife Swap
The twist: They’re secretly swapping out Gary Busey with Nick Nolte for the second half of the hour. (Gonna be nuts!)
3. Charlie’s Angels crew member allegedly fired after slapping Minka Kelly on the butt
Remind me how they deal with these situations on the set of The McLaughlin Group…
4. Steve-O breaks his nose running into Mike Tyson’s fist at Charlie Sheen roast
The good news? The MRI of Steve-O’s head came back clean. Really clean. Like, nothing going on in there at all!
5. Tom Sizemore arrested again, released on bail
On my to-do list: Make ”Sizemore arrested again” one of my keyboard shortcuts, possibly Alt-Shift-y.
6. Voice of Homer Simpson, Dan Castellaneta, sells $5.5 million Pacific Palisades home to voice of Moe, Hank Azaria
The deal was about to fall apart when Castellaneta threw in baby Maggie, who, according to at least one cash-register scanner, is worth $243.26.
7. Justin Bieber reportedly rents out Staples Center for Titanic screening for Selena Gomez
There was a technical glitch as the Jumbotron showed 194 minutes of L.A. Clippers highlights instead, but no one seemed to notice.
8. Katie Holmes to guest as ”Slutty Pumpkin” in How I Met Your Mother‘s Halloween episode
Next time, Snooki.
9. The L Word actress Leisha Hailey and girlfriend escorted off Southwest flight after public display of affection, which airline called ”excessive”
The airline knew it had a problem when passengers noticed Billie Joe Armstrong’s pants becoming less saggy.