By Sandra Gonzalez
September 16, 2011 at 12:00 PM EDT
Ron Tom/NBC

Welcome to Spoiler Room: Jen’s Edition. Kidding. But also not really. After wrapping up today’s column, I realized I chose four questions from people named Jen. I promise you, this is not an act of favoritism. But now I’m really curious how many of you are out there.

Regardless, if you ask, I’ll answer. So get askin’! Send your questions, ponderings, new show scoop requests, and post-premiere reactions to spoilerroom@ew.com. And if many of your names happen to be Jen, fantastic. (Your move, Sarahs.)

‘GREY’S ANATOMY’: FINALLY SOME MER/DER FOR YOU

I can’t tell you how often I get harassed lovingly asked for Meredith and Derek scoop, and after sitting through next week’s two-hour premiere with my mouth hanging open for 80 minutes (two hours, minus commercials), here’s what you’re going to get out of me on Mer/Der, Crowen, and Alex (who is sans nickname because he’s all alone. Poor Alex).

Mer/Der: Derek is pissed. VERY pissed. And that doesn’t change for much of the two-hour episode, except when it comes to Zola. When he has that baby in his arms, he’s a heap of adorable, protective daddy. Meredith is a good mom, too. In fact, I’d say, too good. And while Mer/Der fans should prepare for some fireworks between these two, as shown in the preview, there’s also one moment in the second hour that reminds you exactly why you love this couple. Sadly, it might be too little, too late in many regards.

Meanwhile, Crowen’s baby drama continues, and while I absolutely can’t tell you how it ends, I can say that it’s certainly going to affect Cristina and Owen this year. And this entire storyline will leave you so happy that two actors of this magnitude are paired up on this show. Because their scenes are out-of-this world good, especially one that takes place in the stairway.

And while Cristina isn’t battling with Owen, she’s taking out her frustrations on poor Alex. If she’s not kicking his ass (as shown in one of the promo pics), she’s almost accidentally killing him. But overall, he’s my MVP of the premiere for yet another fantastic scene in which he plays hero to a kid, his reaction to being shunned by everyone, and many more reasons not mentioned here (but possibly teased here).

‘HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER’: YOU THINK YOU KNOW…

Before we jump into what I know about the season premiere of How I Met Your Mother (airing Monday!), let’s recap what we’ve been told (slash I’ve told you), shall we? It takes place at Punchy’s wedding, Barney and Robin will dance, we will revisit Barney’s wedding, Marshall and Lily are hiding their pregnancy news, Robin still has feelings for Barney (as hinted in last season’s finale), and Ted is a big-shot architect whose face has graced New York magazine but finds himself recommitted to the dating game. Holy hell, we know a lot. But, honestly, it’s also just the tip of the iceberg. So here are three monster teases to help you make it through the weekend.

1. There are not one, but TWO big announcements made in the first episode. You might be able to guess one very easily.

2. Remember the taxi scene from the season finale? There’s one comparably heartbreaking scene in the premiere involving the same people that you’re going to love!

3. What could possibly be a HUGE clue to one of the show’s major mysteries is revealed at the end of the first half hour. I hope someone picks up on it so we can discuss if I’m reading too much into this or if my hunch is correct.

Need more? Send me an email with your follow up/unanswered questions and maybe I’ll cobble something more together for you over the weekend and put it up before the premiere!

‘HOUSE’: SLAMMED (AGAINST THE WALL) IN THE SLAMMER

What’s always fascinated me about House is how well he manages to adapt to situations before him. That’s a lot to say for a man who adapts for no one. But when his neck is on the line, he takes in his surroundings and makes them work for him. (Like when he was in the psychiatric hospital and learned how to manipulate the system.) The problem with prison? His approach to life could get him killed in there. And there were a few moments in the season premiere where I was genuinely worried about exactly that. My concerns about House’s safety were compounded by a really cool detail in the first episode that counts down the days until his release from prison (if he can stay out of trouble). The matters complicating such a task? His psycho cell mate, a pack of bullies, a compelling case involving another inmate that he can’t help but involve himself in, and, well, this is House. He loves trouble. Send follow-up questions to spoilerroom@ew.com and I’ll see if I can answer a few for you ahead of the show’s Oct. 3 premiere!

NEXT: SIDE DISHES! Scoop on ‘Raising Hope,’ ‘Castle,’ ‘Cougar Town,’ and more!

SIDE DISHES

I’d love some news on Raising Hope! I miss my favorite dysfunctional family! — Jenn

Having watched the season premiere, I can promise you that the dysfunctional train passes through Chez Chance several times. The premiere is just as awesome as season 1… if not better! The first episode will, as previously reported, center around Jimmy (Lucas Neff) trying to reclaim the secret musical talent he had as a 13-year-old (Greyson Chance) after seeing himself on an old home movie. And according to executive producer Greg Garcia, the secrets don’t stop there this season! In a conference call with reporters yesterday, Garcia told the group that episode 3, which finds Burt getting kidnapped (adult-napped?), will reveal “some big secret” that Virginia has been keeping. “It’s the year of secrets!” he said.

Will the premiere show significant movement forward in the #Castle/Beckett front in it’s usual Castle kind of way? In short, will fans be satisfied or frustrated? — @sspader1

Both. But that’s what’s so great about how they’ve structured the season premiere. The last two minutes of the season premiere will definitely give you an idea of how this season is going to proceed with these two crazy kids. I’m legally obligated under the threat of beheading to stop talking now. Also, if you’re not following me on Twitter, I suggest you do so before the premiere. You won’t be sorry! (@EWSandraG)

Hi Sandra, I know Cougar Town is coming back, but I’m not seeing it on any of the fall schedules! When will it be back?! And do you have any good scoop on the cul-de-sac crew? — Jen

There’s no solid premiere date yet, but it will be back sometime in midseason. Meanwhile, I’d use that time to prepare for the arrival of a truly terrifying figure: Ellie’s two-faced mother, Claire, who is as sweet as they come… unless she thinks you’re not in the room. What’s that I see? Oh! Look! It’s a casting couch! Now taking your suggestions!

Anything on the new season of Parks? Please!! Something on Leslie and Ben or even some Tammy scoop would be great! — Lucy

There’s so much I don’t even know where to begin! Here’s what I’ll say: Tammy 1 isn’t a prominent figure until episode 2, but her presence is certainly felt in episode 1. And her appearance causes not one, but two radical facial hair changes in Ron. You’ll see what I mean. On the Leslie and Ben front, all I can say is that their relationship takes an unexpected turn in the second episode. That’s true even if you were expecting an unexpected turn. And if you weren’t, why don’t you decide what you would expect and then add something unexpected to that. Got it? (Probably not. But that’s the point.) Also, is it wrong to laugh when you learn of a person’s secret disfigurement? If it is, prepare to be very wrong.

I’d love some Nikita news! — Michelle

Remember how I mentioned to you that Michael’s former flame is coming to town? Well, a normal girl might get jealous, but according to the lovely Maggie Q, it’s actually going to make for some amazing Mikita moments: “There are some eyebrows raised because he didn’t tell her about it. But what’s beautiful about that episode is that Nikita is sort of shocked by this. The journey they go on in the episode and the comfort he brings her by the end is something really beautiful. It’s like, ‘Yes, I got wrapped up in this to help somebody, but you’ve got to know how I fell. This is the real deal.’ That does get them through it. And it will.” But, she warns, “there are other problems on the horizon that do involve her. Maybe things that Nikita might not be able to fix.”

NEXT: MORE SIDE DISHES! Scoop on ‘The Vampire Diaries,’ ‘Supernatural,’ ‘Parenthood,’ and more!

DEAD MAN GAWKING Werewolf Ray (David Gallagher) looks worried even before Klaus (Joseph Morgan) and Stefan (Paul Wesley) invent Truth or Wolfsbane Darts.
Bob Mahoney/The CW

The Vampire Diaries absolutely rocked my world last night! PLEASE, I need some Stefan/Elena scoop. That phone call! How much longer are they going to be apart?! — Erika

First, do NOT get me started on that phone call. Absolutely devastating. Now, for the possibly upsetting news, it sounds like they might be apart for a while. Paul Wesley opened up about it all at the CW premiere party this weekend, saying “I hate to be cheesy, but on a symbolic level, he’s really apart from everybody. He’s physically apart for a while, in a different location, but he’s in a completely different space,” he says. “He and Elena were just not what they were. It could go on indefinitely, man, for sure.” But will there come a point where he forgets about Elena? “I think at a certain point, he thinks he has. Whether or not he truly has is left to be seen to me. I think he thinks he has to because he forces himself to [forget her], and circumstances force it, too. Genuinely, they force him to.”

Anything on Vampire Diaries would make my morning!! PLEASE! — Dani

Paul Wesley can’t wait for you to see an upcoming episode that “shows a side of Stefan that we haven’t seen before.” “I think it was probably the most fun I had shooting Vampire Diaries period, in any episode,” he said. “It’s a scene where I’m basically saying goodbye to my old self.”

Hi Sandra! I love that you love Supernatural as much as I do, if not more! More scoop from the show please! Alyssa

Well, there’s a nail-bitter of a premiere coming up NEXT WEEK, in case you didn’t know. But at the CW’s premiere party in Burbank last weekend, Misha Collins was nice enough to enlighten us on an issue that was of great (and shallow) interest to me: Castiel’s creepy facial scar. “Castiel is definitely having problems with his complexion in the first and second episodes of the season. Because he is God now, he has a lot of work to do, and is taking care of Hell, Earth, and Heaven. Frankly, in all of the craziness, he hasn’t time to see a dermatologist,” he joked. “It took three extra hours everyday in makeup to deal with the boils and blisters and deal with the puss-y disgustingness that was Castiel at the beginning of the season.”

I appreciate the Parenthood love! It’s one of the best shows on TV and I hope NBC doesn’t do something crazy and cancel it. I’d love any scoop you’ve got, especially if it involves Lauren Graham’s Sarah, and her NOT getting back together with her ex Seth. But I’ll take scoop any which way. Also, please use your fancy Hollywood pull to ask Jason Katims to tell Hattie/Sarah Ramos (not sure if it’s a script thing or an actor thing) to stop saying “I mean… ” before every line. Am I the only who notices this?! It’s noticeable and repetitive and drives me bananas. — Jen

You’re not alone on the latter, Jen. And you’re also not alone in wanting Sarah to stay away from her toxic ex. Luckily, I hear her and Mark (Jason Ritter) will be going strong at least by episode 8, when he gets a chance to hang out with the family. But something tells me there’s trouble afoot for another couple in the same episode. A casting call is currently out for a receptionist named Rachel who loves the music business as much as she loves putting the moves on her married boss.

Hi Sandra. Any scoop on CSI: NY? — Ben

What about a casting nugget? I’m told Third Watch vet Jason Wiles will be heading back the street of (fictional) New York, but this time, on the other side of the law. He will play John Curtis, a man connected to a case Jo (Sela Ward) worked on in D.C. that ultimately led to her leaving and joining the crime lab. Ali (Beau Garrett) accuses John of raping her. The episode is scheduled to air Nov. 4.

Okay, you sly minx, I want more on Psych. They’ve been off my TV screen for far too long and I want any detail I can get! — Jen

This casting news enough? No. Hmm… fine, greedy. Try again next week.

Hi Sandra, Can you please give me some scoop on Timothy Olyphant? Will he be returning to the Office this year? If not, some Justified scoop can ease the pain. Thank you. — Kim

No word on a return to The Office, but sources to tell me that Justified is back at work next month, which means fresh scoop for you! When EW’s Carrie Borzillo caught up with Walton Goggins at the Creative Arts Emmy Awards last weekend, he said that “loose ends” with Bennetts will be tied up and we’re “going to see Boyd Crowder fill the power vacuum, as it were, and get back to his shenanigans and become a showman again, which I’m excited about.”

Harry’s Law, please! EW was rough on it last season, but I liked the cast and the show. Have any scoop for me? — Diana

Well, for one, we will see a few seconds-long flashes of Brittany Snow’s character, for those who were eager to hear about that. But any questions about her dialed-back role are not addressed in the first three episodes of the new season, which starts Sept. 21. The first eps will focus on the trial of Eric Sanders (Alfred Molina), a man accused of murdering his wife who has a hard time convincing others (including Harry, at one point) of his innocence. Also, after being killed off Hawaii Five-0 last season, Jean Smart is coming on board to play D.A. Roseanna Remmick — that’s something worth looking forward to. She’s pure evil and has it out for Harry after she reluctantly agrees to help Oliver (Mark Valley) with the case. But how bad does their feud get? Lets just say one of them ends the premiere in handcuffs!

(Lynette Rice, Nicolas White and Carrie Borzillo contributed to this column.)

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