By Lynette Rice
Updated July 10, 2011 at 11:56 PM EDT

If you consider yourself a rabid Big Brother fan (and we know there are millions of you out there), then you probably already know that Dick Donato left the house shortly after the show’s premiere on Thursday. His departure should mean that tonight’s nomination ceremony will be a practice in futility: The house already had its first evictee, and his name was Evel Dick.

Personally, I can’t be more pleased about this surprise turn of events. (Shocker! I find him absolutely reprehensible). But his departure has spawned quite a few online conspiracy theories, namely that he staged some sort of Diary Room blowup and demanded an immediate eviction just so he could use the ordeal to promote his website. Then again, the dynamic between Evel Dick and his daughter Daniele on premiere night was just too uncomfortable to overlook, which could also mean that Daddy-O just didn’t want to spend another minute with a daughter who couldn’t stand him so he sought a quick getaway. After all, Dick did say that it had been three years since he had spoken to Daniele, who turned out to be quite the vision with her blonde-turned-brunette locks. (Hey, even I can muster up a few pleasantries about the Donato clan).

I’m hoping tonight’s nomination ceremony can shed some light on this mystery, even though CBS said we wouldn’t learn the full story until Wednesday’s episode. At the same time, I’m also feeling like the episode may be a waste of time because no one should have to go home if Dick already did. What do you think, BB fans? Weigh in with your opinions and/or conspiracy theories below. (Spoilers who frequent genius sites like Jokers Updates, refrain from spilling too much, please). And check back later for a full BB recap.