By Aly Semigran
Updated June 15, 2011 at 07:32 PM EDT
Credit: Samir Hussein/Getty Images

Dearly beloved PopWatchers, we are gathered here today to inform you that Marrying Hef — a Lifetime special that was set to chronicle the upcoming nuptials of 85-year-old Playboy founder Hugh Hefner to his fiance, 25-year-old Playmate Crystal Harris — has been postponed indefinitely since the couple’s announcement that they have canceled their wedding. Our deepest regrets and sincerest apologies.

Lifetime confirmed to EW that the network would “not be moving forward” with airing the special, which would have also shown the blessed event itself. This bums me out for a number of reasons, other than, obviously, the idea that true love could not prevail. (If those two crazy kids can’t make it, what chance do the rest of us have?!) I’m not only lamenting the loss of the Hef-Harris special, but also all the spin-offs that could have been:

Honeymooning With Hef

Eating Dinner At 3 p.m. With Hef

Puttering Around With Hef

Hef Keeps Offering Me Werther’s Originals

Divorcing With Hef

Hef Rebounding With Someone That Looks Exactly Like Crystal Harris

Rebound Lady Marrying Hef

Crystal: What The Hef You Guys?! (immediately following Kendra on E!)

Are you bummed there won’t be a Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris marriage and Lifetime special, PopWatchers?

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