Jack On Island
Credit: ABC

HBO should cross China off its list of potential markets for Game of Thrones.

The Chinese government’s State Administration of Radio Film and Television has issued new entertainment guidelines discouraging TV writers from creating shows about “fantasy, time-travel, random compilations of mythical stories…”

So much for all Syfy channel shows. Not to mention shows like Lost, Fringe, Star Trek and Camelot. Seems the rule may have been prompted by writers annoying the government by telling historical stories that deviated from the official version of Chinese history and — oh, wait. There’s more banned content on the list.

According to CNN, the China authorities are also nixing “… bizarre plots, absurd techniques, propagating feudal superstitions, fatalism and reincarnation.”

Now “Bizarre plots” and “absurd techniques” takes a lot of the broadcast shows off the market too. I mean, Patrick Jane’s absurd mentalism techniques cannot possibly trick all those murderers into confessing, and Dr. House certainly uses plenty of odd techniques that would probably never work in real life. But who wants to see people solving crimes and healing patients the boring ‘ol normal way? As far as “bizarre plots,” all of Fox’s animated shows and South Park are bizarre, when you think about it. Though I suspect U.S. writers could be OK with leaving out content that’s “propagating feudal suspicions.”

What? There’s more on the list?

The Chinese government is also nixing: “…ambiguous moral lessons, and a lack of positive thinking.”

Well, there goes every show I watch.