Modern Family
Credit: Adam Larkey/ABC

Image Credit: Adam Larkey/ABCMy best birthday ever took place at a Jungle Jim’s Playland in San Antonio, which in retrospect was actually a pretty shady place. But when I was seven years old, I loved it. It was simple, age-appropriate fun that I wouldn’t trade for the world even now. That’s why my soul died a little when I read about TLC’s new (efficiently titled) new show, Outrageous Kid Parties.

Apparently, the days of moon bounces, cheesy clowns (see: Fizbo, pictured), and sheet cakes, will no longer do for some kids — and parents, for that matter. And this show will celebrate the loss by highlighting the ones who go overboard and spend “a small fortune” on their child’s celebration. The four-part series will air starting Feb. 21 after Cake Boss.

My Super Sweet 16 already horrifies me. So I can’t imagine what my reaction will be to this show, in which the parents will likely be ten times more offensive than the children. The only good thing I see coming from this is that maybe I ‘ll be more inclined to give to the poor, in hopes of boosting the spirits of those who have outrageously depressing kid parties (which actually sounds like a great title for some counter programming, no?).

In all seriousness, I know I’ll be watching. I have great faith in TLC to always provide me with mind-bendingly bad television that I can never stop watching.

Thoughts, PopWatchers? Will this be horrifying but hypnotic? Would you watch my suddenly in-development show, Outrageously Depressing Kid Parties?

On Twitter: @EWSandraG