By Michael Ausiello
October 27, 2010 at 12:00 PM EDT

Image Credit: Ray Mickshaw/Fox; Craig Sjodin/ABC; Adam Taylor/ABC; Adam Taylor/Fox; Randy Holmes/ABCQuestion: Maybe I missed it, but when is your last day at EW? And where are you going? —Cynthia

Ausiello: Let me see if I can peel back the thick layer of denial long enough to type this next sentence: My last day at EW is this Friday. As far as where I’m going, click here to have your memory refreshed. Or just join — or, rather, like — my new Facebook page. More specific details about my next steps will be posted there shortly. There’s also Twitter. Okay, time to climb back into my denial suit and get crackin’ on my final AA at EW. Sources confirm to me exclusively that I’m going out with a bang!

Question: Any information on when Olivia Wilde is returning to House? —Christine

Ausiello: Probably not until spring. You’ll be happy to know that her temporary replacement, Amber Tamblyn, makes a positive first impression in her Nov. 8 debut. As you would expect, her character — supersmart and moralistic med student Martha M. Masters — gets quite a hazing from House‘s boys club. We’ll soon discover that a member of said club shares a past with House‘s “immutable obstacle,” as Dr. Crankenstein calls her. Other colorful nicknames assigned to the newbie on her first day of work include:

* The Internet with breasts

* Small Wonder

* The love child of Einstein and Mary Poppins

* The Bunny

* Pippy Long Division

Question: House scoop? —Jennifer

Ausiello: House pink-slips a member of his team during November sweeps. Not once, not twice, but three times. Also, three major characters do some jail time.

Question: Could you please give some spoilers on Psych regarding Shawn and Juliet? —Steve

Ausiello: The show’s fall premiere (airing Nov. 10) will pick up shortly after the couple’s big kiss in the finale. “Our viewers are probably a little unsure of what that kiss meant,” says exec producer Steve Franks. “Will Juliet still take some time away on the Amalfi coast with Declan, or did the kiss change her mind? In the 5.5 premiere, she is still on her way to Italy, and Shawn is on his way to Canada at the request of convicted thief Pierre Despereaux [a returning Cary Elwes]. Their divergent travel plans may have derailed their romantic momentum, until Juliet unexpectedly shows up in Vancouver for Despereaux’s extradition and that spark becomes a fire. The question is, Do Shawn and Juliet believe ‘what happens in Canada, stays in Canada’? Stay tuned.”

Question: I recently discovered that we share the same birthday — Feb. 23! In honor of that, I think you should share some Bones scoop with me! — Catherine

Ausiello: Seinfeld‘s Wayne Knight will channel his inner Willy Wonka when he guest-stars as a candy magnate in an episode that features “one of our most revolting body finds ever,” reveals exec producer Stephen Nathan. “A body is discovered inside one of the world’s largest chocolate bars. It’s delightfully revolting.”

Question: Which episode marks Hannah’s permanent exit from Bones? —Lexie

Ausiello: That’s awfully presumptuous of you, Lexie. The fact is, Katheryn Winnick’s stint as Booth’s lover (and Brennan’s new BFF) doesn’t actually have an end date. “We don’t know how long she’s going to be with us this season,” says Nathan. “We want to keep it open. Hannah’s story is still evolving; we don’t know how we want to wrap it up. And even if she does go away, we want to leave open the possibility that she may come back.”

Question: It’s been a while since we’ve had any good Bones scoops. Do you have any interesting information to get me through the baseball hiatus? —Amy

Ausiello: How ’bout another tidbit about everyone’s favorite character, Hannah. “I’m working on an episode right now where Brennan and Hannah’s friendship is tested,” reveals Nathan. “It relates to something that happened between Booth and Brennan at the end of the Brennan-centric episode. It creates some friction between Booth, Brennan, and Hannah that has to be worked out.” Hmm…any thoughts on what happens between B&B? Hit the comments!

Question: May I please have some Puck-related Glee scoop? —Brittany

Ausiello: He’s not the character getting expelled.

Question: Are Burt and Carole getting married on Glee? —Danielle

Ausiello: They are if Kurt has anything to say about it. Speaking of weddings, the rumors are true: Sue is going to make history by becoming the first person on earth to marry — or at least attempt to marry — ****el*!

Question: Any more Glee scoop — maybe something about Kurt and his new BF, Darren Criss (Blaine)? —Matt

Ausiello: Save the date: Their first kiss is scheduled for Nov. 9! CLARIFICATION: An insider tells me that while it’s true that there is a memorable kiss in the Nov. 9 episode, it’s not between Kurt and Blaine. Sorry for the confusion! In related news, did you hear about this?

Question: Do you have any extra clues you could shed about what exactly Tess “is” on Smallville? —Gage

Ausiello: You’ll get your answer on Nov. 12.

Question: Do you have any Modern Family scoop? It is easily my favorite show. —Billie

Ausiello: Mitchell’s “straight” past comes back to haunt him around mid-November when CTU legend Mary Lynn Rajskub guest-stars as his ex. “She dated Mitchell in high school, and they may’ve done the nasty,” says Rajskub with a chuckle. “I think he broke my heart.” The two have what Rajskub calls an “awkward” reunion at a shopping center. “Mitch and Cam end up coming over to talk to me about an incident,” she teases, “but I can’t discuss that because it’ll ruin the story.”

Question: I was curious if you had any information on the 24 movie. Will it be going into production soon? —Brandon

Ausiello: Based on the following status report from Rajskub, I’m guessing the answer is no. “I don’t know what’s going on with it,” she says. “Everybody asks me about it, but I don’t know anything. I think it would be great if it happened a year after the show went off the air, but I haven’t heard anything.”

Question: Beautiful series finale of Ausiello TV. I laughed, I cried, I was surprised and confused. Thanks for all the great scoop, wit, snark, and Smurfy goodness. I promise to weep for all of six seconds before moving forward with life. —Jen

Ausiello: Thanks, Jenny. That means a lot. One quick thing: You are aware I’m not dying, right? Just want to make sure you knew that.

Question: Can you give us a really juicy Grey’s Anatomy spoiler as a going-away present? —Ashley

Ausiello: Um, shouldn’t you be buying me the presents? Eh, whatever. This has always been kind of a one-sided relationship, so no point screwing with such a winning formula now. Here’s your scoop: Series creator Shonda Rhimes reiterated to me in a recent interview that Callie and Arizona are in it for the long haul. “Their journey is going to be long and hard, but that doesn’t mean they’re not going to end up together,” she maintained. “People better just prepare themselves for things to be difficult.” I then asked her if she would put Mark and Lexie in that same soul-mate-type category, and she replied, “No,” before quickly adding, “That doesn’t mean that I don’t see them as two people who are going to end up together… There’s hope for Mark and Lexie, [but] Lexie has some growing up to do, as does Mark.”

Question: There’s a Grey’s rumor going around about an Alex/April/Lexie triangle. True? —Diana

Ausiello: False. “I honestly have no idea what [fans] are talking about,” responded Rhimes. “We have no plans for an Alex/April/Lexie triangle.”

Question: Got anything on the truly epic Boardwalk Empire? —Hope

Ausiello: We meet Nucky’s (Steve Buscemi) dad in this Sunday’s episode, and to say father and son had a frakked-up relationship is an understatement of epic proportions. The ep also features a memorable showdown between Michael Pitt’s Jimmy and the thug who slashed his hooker girlfriend’s face. Oh, and shocker: Another recurring character gets whacked!

Question: Can I have some scoop on Castle? —Lori

Ausiello: A pivotal couple will break things off in the near future, and I can confirm it’s either Gina and Castle or Beckett and this guy. Elsewhere, a new — and rather surprising — interoffice romance will ignite in January.

Question: Can you please give me some good NCIS scoop, preferably about McGee? —Z.

Ausiello: He’s not the team member who gets “shot” in the big two-parter on Nov. 16 and 23. For those keeping track at home, that leaves Tony, Vance, and Ziva in the running. Oh, and I put SHOT in quotes because it’s not exactly a traditional shooting. The person will be wounded not by a gun, but by an explosive weapon.

Question: Could you please resume using the term “hitcom”? I really like it. Thanks for your consideration. —Ron

Ausiello: Yes! This past week has been HELL without it! Consider it officially reactivated!

Question: I was reading that CBS might cancel CSI: NY. —Jen

Ausiello: I think you’re confusing CSI: NY with Medium, which just had its episode order cut back from 22 to 13. I think CSI: NY — which has been doing solid business on Fridays — is safe for the time being. Speaking of the spin-off, Karina Lombard of Rescue Me and L Word fame has just been cast as the grieving mother of the victim in a January episode.

Question: What chance does Parenthood have of getting a full season? —Chevy

Ausiello: I’d say it stands a pretty good chance, since it already received a full-season pickup in May.

Question: I would like some 90210 scoop, please. —Greg

Ausiello: Casting scoop: Make It or Break It‘s Zachary Abel has been tapped to play, um, Zach, a hot surfer dude that Naomi develops a major crush on.

Question: What is the deal with Juliet on Gossip Girl? —Kathleen

Ausiello: The deal is I’m hearing a major character (or two) will join forces with the troublemaker to take Serena down. Exec producer Stephanie Savage, meanwhile, says, “A good chunk of Juliet’s plan will be revealed by the end of the first half of the season, but elements of it will carry over.”

Question: I’m in need of some Chuck spoilers to make my day better! —Natalie

Ausiello: There’s a major twist at the end of next Monday’s episode, and it involves him and her.

Question: After watching this week’s episode of Brothers & Sisters, I’m scared for the future of Kevin and Scotty. Please tell me they’ll live happily ever after! —Stucky

Ausiello: B&S showrunner David Marshall Grant sure isn’t talking like it’s the end. “This isn’t so much about the crisis itself,” he says, “as it is about watching two people fight their way through it.” BTW, we’ll meet the “other man” this Sunday, and he’s going to look a lot like Ryan Abbot from Three Rivers (a.k.a. Christopher Hanke).

Question: Like, joking aside, what’s happened to all the Brothers & Sisters scoops?! Please! I’m desperate! —Sophie

Ausiello: As my frenemy first scooped, Balthazar Getty is returning in January for the show’s 100th episode. And per Grant, he’ll be sticking around for a while. “He’s coming back for [at least] three episodes,” says the boss, who confirms that Tommy returns with a new girlfriend on his arm. “It causes a big stir in the Walker family.”

Question: Got any Good Wife scoop? —Carly C.

Ausiello: Casting scoop!! Leelee Sobieski will guest-star in a January episode as the girlfriend of one of Lockhart/Bond’s most influential clients. Both stand accused of using prescription stimulants.

Question: What’s the latest on Grey’s giving viewers proper closure for Alex and Izzie? —Jesus

Ausiello: The latest appears in the new issue of Entertainment Weekly. And it’s juicy.

Question: Do you know any Vampire Diaries scoop? —Savannah

Ausiello: Trent Ford and Daniel Gillies have joined the show along with Lauren Cohan as centuries-old vampires Trevor, Elijah, and Rose. “They have deep ties to Katerina Petrova,” reveals exec producer Julie Plec. “They will be heavily featured in November sweeps episodes ‘Rose’ and ‘Katerina.’ “

That’s a wrap! Final housekeeping note: The e-mail address will be operational for only a few more days, so get those congratulatory/encouragement messages in ASAP. And don’t forget to come visit me on Facebook and Twitter. I suck at goodbyes, so I’ll make this short and simple: Group hug? (Additional reporting by Tim Stack)