'30 Rock' finale recap: We'll see you in heaven, Kenneth
Image Credit: Ali Goldstein/NBCHe may not be astronaut Mike Dexter, but pilot Carol was pretty close to a perfect match for our friend Liz Lemon: handsome, successful, a dorky dancer, and a fan of Fart Doctors. After tirelessly trying to force love upon herself, things finally seemed to work out. Sure Liz could have settled for Wesley “dress slippers” Snipes or take her chances with the Somali pirate groomsmen, but she’d much rather follow the signs that were suddenly so clear to her. Matt Damon as a man in uniform who agrees on the NBA tattoo problem? Praise to the universe, love is real!
Though Jack may not agree, fate did take a role in propelling major changes in just about everyone’s relationships (how timely!): Avery was pregnant, Nancy was shipping back up to Boston, Jenna was now dating Paul-Jenna and Paul-Cher, and Kenneth was being forced to leave his best friends in the whole wide world comma because he had been fired. I didn’t say they all were happy changes! While you digest that last bit of news, enjoy the 10 best lines from “I Do Do”:
“This is my dream come true! And to hear it from my best friend in the whole world comma bald category.” — Kenneth, possible junior in charge boy of the entire NBC page program
“Maybe I’m old fashioned, but when a girl dates a straight man who impersonates her on stage for mostly gay audiences, she has certain expectations. Fidelity, Paul! It’s not just the name of a bank that sued me.” — Jenna, whose bachelorette party theme will be “Sluts”
“Well it’s all true, I’m a native of Houston, and I love to cook healthy.” — Paul, who sometimes wishes he opened the other door at the haunted house sex party
“Would you like to go to a rich girl’s wedding with me?”
“I don’t know, does that sound like more fun than me eating alone at the LaGuardia Chili’s?” — Liz and Carol, a doorman to the sky
“Wassup? Nuthin’, just giving a dumb tour to a bunch of uggos. Let’s meet up later and smoke some drug cigarettes.” — Kenneth, whose thing is to smile creepily all the time
“You know what a great pilot would have done? Not hit the birds. That’s what I do everyday: not hit birds. Where’s my ticket to the Grammys? — Carol, who’s been upstairs in the White House while the Obamas were sleeping
“Smug, 40-year-old bridesmaid. What a treat for everyone!” — Jack who had to wear his sister’s hand-me-down corduroys
“Your behavior as a fiancé has been as weak as American tea! There! I said it.” — Wesley, who had boyhood passion for train accidents
“Keeping it tight stay camera-ready for breaking news. I mean sure Soledad O’Brien does it — “
“I wipe the floor with that bitch!” — Jack and Avery, who knows how to field dress a deer
“I wonder what the Somali pirate’s deal is? I could live on a boat…” — Liz, who swears she has medicine for her disgusting foot secret
Is this the last of Kenneth Ellen Parcell?! It’s sweet that he didn’t want to leave his “best friends” for Los Angeles, but Tracy’s advice (“do a sloppy job, and they’ll leave you alone”) totally backfired when executed in front of the Kabletown executives. Kenneth’s tenure as an NBC page may be up (he did hand in his page gun…), but there’s no way he’ll gone from TGS or 30 Rock in general. What did you think of his impassioned wedding speech? Is he the sweetest drunk ever?
Although Jack had committed to a life of naps, hockey games, and long red hairs caught in overcooked pot roasts with Nancy, fate made him realize the life he wants with Avery. As sweet as his speech to Nancy was, Jack’s no longer a poor mama’s boy from Sagchester, Mass. Now he’s a slick, New York City do do, who needs a woman who knows flat shoes are for quitters. Together he and Avery will teach their future child to say awesome things. Will Avery be a kick ass mom?
Is Carol really the man of Liz’s dreams? Can we expect more Matt Damon next season? How does this season match up to others, PopWatchers? Sound off below!
Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, and Tracy Morgan star in the Emmy-winning comedy. You want to go to there.