'Ugly Betty' Bites: 18 juicy lines from 'The Past Presents the Future'!
Image Credit: Patrick Harbron/ABC
Wasn’t last night’s second-to-last episode of Ugly Betty one of the most precious hours of television ever? Between Hilda’s wedding — she and Bobby are too cute together! — and, of course, Justin’s sweetly subtle coming out, I was bawling during most of the hour. Okay, I’m being a bit dramatic, of course, but I honestly couldn’t help but tear up with the Justin stuff. I simply loved that Justin didn’t ever say “I’m gay” — instead, he just walked on to the dance floor with his new boyfriend, Austin, and his family couldn’t have been happier. This kid is 16 years old, people! Wow, wow, wow. Warms my heart that this kind of thing is on network television! It’s for storylines like this — and, you know, everything else, like the fashion and whatnot — that will make Ugly Betty go down in television history.
Oh, and, of course, I was howling, too, when watching how the Suarez family wanted to deal with Justin’s sexuality, before trusty old Marc stepped in to stop them. Pride flags everywhere! A coming-out party! A “we’re okay with you being gay” saying that makes me just cringe! But it was hilarious. Marc’s advice for not pursing all of these things further couldn’t have been more on-point. Actually, he’s been pretty on point lately in general! The whole show has been, indeed. Too sad that it has to go now. But at least it’s going out on a high point, right? Bryan Batt, Amanda and Betty moving on from Mode, Marc figuring out his relationship problems, etc. Lots going on!
And Betty seems like it will go out with a bang, too! Literally! Was Wilhelmina really shot? Don’t be fooled folks — the Ugly Betty producers wouldn’t kill of fan fave, Willy. But will the whole shooting thwart her plans to take over Meade via Tyler? Guess we’ll have to see in next week’s series finale. Can’t wait!
Until then, enjoy the Ugly Betty Bites I pulled out for you from last night’s episode. There were some doozies. I especially loved when Marc attempted to redirect Ignacio’s Justin-is-gay! energy by pushing him toward other family members at Hilda’s wedding with this little bon mot: “Hello, Aunt Spanish! You look bonita!” Hehe. My other favorites are here, all 18 of them:
“Yah, but I needed some pencils. Plus, how could I set up shop without my ‘Sleeping Betty’?” —Amanda, on her return to the Mode office to pick up a few things, including an unflattering photo of Betty where she’s sleeping
“Hey, Troy. Oh, wow, nice jeans—they really make your package pop!” —Marc, upon seeing his “ex-boyfriend” Troy
“Here are the earrings I promised Hilda for her wedding. And here are the diet pills. I want her as skinny as a beautiful corpse when your Papi helps her down the aisle.” —Amanda, dropping a few things off with Betty before Hilda’s wedding
“It sounds like he put on a few pounds.” —Amanda, upon hearing the voicemail Henry left for Betty
“Who knows why you do anything, lady. That’s why we love you—just as you are: brown and complicated.” —Amanda, to Betty
“I am getting married in three days. I swear to God if you upstage me, I will stab you in the heart!” —Hilda, after Betty mentions all that’s going on in her life
“I love shopping more than my own grandmother!” —Spencer, to his new stylist Amanda
“I can see that we need to stay away from anything in the salmon family. Mostly because I hate salmon.” —Amanda, to her new client Spencer
“Marc, just give Spencer a chance! You will love him. He’s like me—but with junk! He’s like me, but with big junk!” —Amanda, trying to convince Marc to go out with Spencer
“Oh, Claire, have you escaped from your handlers again? Or have they allowed you a senior outing?” —Willy, upon seeing Claire at a Mode photo shoot
“Isn’t that the pickled lush calling the kettle black?” —Willy, after Claire insults her
“I have some nail polish remover in the bathroom. I heard you can get a buzz off that?” —Willy, to Claire’s son Tyler, who’s ransacking her house looking for booze
“This is the happiest day of my life. Alright, let’s do this bitch!” —Hilda, before going into get married
“And we’re circulating and mingling. Hello, Aunt Spanish! You look bonita!” —Marc, while trying to distract Ignacio from embarrassing Justin at Hilda’s wedding
“Marc, here! Okay, Spencer, Marc—silver fox, purple ferret. See, you two are totally hitting it off already. Kiss!” —Amanda, trying to get Spencer and Marc to like each other at Hilda’s wedding
“Tyler, this is the third message I’ve left. Dick Cheney returns my calls after one. Call me!” —Willy, to Claire’s son Tyler, who she’s manipulating
“Don’t cry. It makes you look like a girl!” —Amanda, to Marc
“Has anyone ever told you that you have the mouth of a silent movie star? Sexy, yet cruel…” —Spencer, to Marc
What’d you think of last night’s episode? Are you satisfied with how producers finally dealt with Justin’s coming out? Are you worried that Willy is dead? Can you believe Betty is really going to London? What was your favorite line? Sound off in the comments below!
Tanner on Twitter: @EWTanStransky
More ‘Ugly Betty’ Bites from EW.com: