By Annie Barrett
Updated March 18, 2010 at 04:24 PM EDT

Can’t Ryan Seacrest and Simon Cowell just get along? Well, no — their faux “rivalry” tinged with faux sexual tension is one of the pop cultural pillars of our time. But during last night’s “spat” on American Idol, Simon wasn’t even trying. Look at Kara, so hopeful for a front-row/shoulder-leaning position for a juicy battle of the brains. Even Ryan’s eyes are wide, puppy-like. He wants to play! He openly disagreed with Simon when Simon sluggishly asked if they could agree “not to cross the line”! But no. Grumpy Gramps will simply not throw his pet a bone. He’s out of there in a few months, what does he care? See ya, suckers.

I’ve never bought that there’s any real Simon-Ryan hostility at play on Idol — and in this morning’s on-the-scene recap, Adam mentions “Simon, Ryan, and Randy were back to their old shenanigans, huddled around Simon’s chair and talking” through at least half of David Cook’s performance. Now that sounds more like it — why can’t Simon transfer such a blatant combo of rudeness and camaraderie to his love-hate relationship with Ryan? Important poll below. For much more about last night’s American Idol Top 12 results night, read Michael Slezak’s recap: Sympathy for the Bedeviled.

Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett