By Annie Barrett
March 16, 2010 at 06:08 PM EDT

Drop everything! This Facebook petition for a Meryl Streep and Lady Gaga collaboration needs 1,000,000 members, at which point the Academy Award-winning actress will immediately kneel down at the doorstep of the Haus of Gaga and ask where she should go to be fitted for a dog collar composed of tiny steaming waffles or something. If this somehow really happens, Streep should definitely reprise her role as actress Madeline Ashton in Robert Zemeckis’ 1992 dark comedy Death Becomes Her. Gaga would obviously become Lisle von Rhoman (Isabella Rossellini, semi-pictured), because she’s super sultry and the bearer of magical potions. You cannot tell me the following trailer isn’t a Lady Gaga video waiting to sneak up on/make out with you in a ladies’ prison.

Beyoncé can play Goldie Hawn’s Helen, and Bruce Willis’ character Ernest will receive the premium Skarsgard Your Loins upgrade as Alexander swoops in to reprise his role as “Boyfriend” in Gaga’s video for “Paparazzi”. I don’t see how this could possibly go wrong. Do you?