February 18, 2010 at 07:30 PM EST

Syfy recently announced plans for upcoming movies called Dinoshark and Sharktopus. Rejoice, B-movie fans! These are destined to be classics of the awesomely awful made-for-TV movie genre. But can they join the ranks of the 10 greatest Syfy movie titles/tagline combos? Because these are pure genius, and 100 percent real:

10. Disaster Zone: Volcano in New York: “Get ready for a hot time in the big City.” See also: Magma: Volcanic Disaster, NYC: Tornado Terror.

9. Dog Soldiers: “A squad of British soldiers, training in an isolated Scottish glen, find lycanthropic action under a full moon.” See also: Hellhounds, Cerberus.

8. Warbirds: “Before the allies could drop the first atomic bomb, they had to get past the Japanese fleet and its island of deadly pterodactyls.”

7. Ice Spiders: “Giant ice spiders escape from a lab and wreak havoc on a nearby ski resort.” See also: Ice Twisters.

6. Flu Bird Horror: “Mutant killer birds carrying a deadly virus attack a group of hikers on a wilderness trek.”

5. Man With the Screaming Brain: “A rich industrialist and a cab driver are fused together and must share a body to find the woman who murdered them both.”

4. Mansquito: “First they hunted for a cure, now they’re hunting a monster.” See also: Man-Thing

3. Carny: “Death becomes the main attraction when a traveling carnival brings a genuine New Jersey Devil to a small town.”

2. Malibu Shark Attack: “When a tsunami hits Malibu, you’re not safe from prehistoric sharks — even if you’re out of the water!”

1. Sharks in Venice: “When man-eating sharks go out for Italian, the city of love will become the city of blood.”

I heartily encourage you to follow Syfy’s head of original movies Karen O’Hara’s Twitter@syfymovies for updates like “Spent half [an] hour discussing what a sharktopus should look like, how many mouths it should have and how it should kill. That’s my job!” Never change, Karen.

Did I skip your favorite Syfy classic, PopWatchers? Did dinosaur soldiers invade your Alaskan town, demanding the evil wizard from Greek mythology reverse his disease-spreading spell?

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