How is it possible that this show gets funnier every week? I mean, you would think that it would have to plateau at some point, but the last few episodes have just gotten better and better. While I thought that last week was ultra-quote worthy, this week’s Valentine’s Day-themed episode may have just topped it. From the tiny details we’ve come to know and love like Gloria’s accent (her pronunciation of the word “COMEdian” was priceless) and Cam’s dramatic one-liners (“It was sort of a Bob Mackie meets Martha Stewart project”) to tonight’s main event of Phil and Claire’s awkward seduction scene (and intimate run in with an escalator ), the bar gets raised each week.
Love was in the air last night, and each Family member had a different way of celebrating Cupid’s favorite holiday — all awkward and funny in their own right, but none as painfully hilarious as Phil and Claire’s. Their role-playing attempt at the hotel bar may have been their best exchange yet. When Phil showed up in his navy blue turtleneck and Clive Bixby name tag, claiming he was “pretty smooth all over,” I nearly died. I mean, he has to be one of the least sexy characters on TV (sorry, Ty Burrell, you know we love you). The highlight of Phil (Clive Bixby) and Claire’s (Juliana) “romantic” role-playing for me was this interchange:
“I’m in town for a trade show I design high-end electro-acoustic transducers” –Phil as Clive (and yes, transducers are a real thing)
“Wow, that is very specific.” –an unimpressed Claire as Juliana
“It’s a fancy way of saying, ‘I get things to make noise.'” – Phil
Though Phil loses his steam when he describes his wife as, “Always so tired and she’s always making lists of things for me to do.”
“Maybe if you did them she wouldn’t be so tired,” Claire shot back
“Oh no, she could make lists for days.” –Phil, successfully killing the mood completely. And scene!
As a random side note, do any of you find Haley’s stoner boyfriend, Dylan, as subtly entertaining as I do? I know he’s supposed to be a side-dish character, and he was hardly in this week’s episode, but he always waltzes in with lines that continue to get more and more clever — or more and more stupid, depending on how you look at them — each week. Tonight’s winner: “All women should look as tasty as you when they’re old.” Of course, what makes Dylan even funnier is Phil’s continued jealousy of him. “Did he trump me? You tell me. He made a painting out of a photograph one time. I have hand picked a card, drawn a heart in the steam on the medicine cabinet, and taken Claire to Fritelli’s, a family style Italian restaurant, for 17 years in a row…yeah, he got me. He got me.”
Now, onto the best non-role-playing lines of the evening!
“Does he have a mallet? Then how does he get hit in the head?” – Gloria, about the comedian Jay is taking her to see.
Favorite Cam and Mitchell exchange:
“I had to settle.” -Mitchell.
“Well, your mom might think so, but some think I’m a catch.” – Cam. I could watch a whole 30-minutes just with them bantering back and forth.
“The universe is cold and loveless.” –Manny, after his Valentine’s Day poem was hijacked before reaching his Valentine
“I’ve seen the kid do a pull up.” -Manny about the kid who stole Manny’s Valentine
“Pretty kitty has nails — I like that.” -Phil (as Clive) to Claire (as Juliana)
“This is so much better than cheesy garlic bread,” -Phil, after Claire hands him her clothes that she has just taken off
“You have a laugh that makes science lab seem like recess,” smooth-talking Manny to his V-day crush, Fiona
“Can we stop calling me little guy? I’m in the fortieth percentile.” – Manny to Mitchell
Jay’s uncouth (and Married…with Children-like) comment of the night: “I have to get old… you don’t have to get fat.”
What did you guys think? Did the Dunphys inspire you to do a little role-playing yourselves come Sunday? Did you laugh out loud like I did when Claire slipped on her own bra and panties after getting unstuck from the escalator? And who’s more romantic Manny or Clive?