'The Vampire Diaries' recap: Sex, lies, and caution tape
Due to the fact that I’ve got a headache more massive than Damon’s ego, I’m going to try to keep this recap as brief as Stefan and Elena’s reconciliation.
The Brothers Salvatore stay in town: Though Damon and Stefan intended on leaving Mystic Falls — “But we’re a team. We could travel the world together. We could try out for The Amazing Race,” Damon said — that all changed when the sheriff showed up to report another vampire attack. It was Logan, who wanted Damon to track him so he could subdue him with wooden bullets and find out how the brothers are able to walk in the sun. Damon, meanwhile, wanted to know who’d turned Logan. Neither talked, but Damon had plenty to say when he got home: “No, I’m not okay,” he told Stefan over the phone. “I was ambushed. I was shot. Now I’m vengeful. I’ve just got to find him.”
When he did find Logan — driving to a secluded location to turn Caroline into a vampire — Damon was about to stake him until Logan said Damon wasn’t the only one who wanted to get into the tomb underneath the church and that there was another way to break the spell keeping Katherine and the other vampires mystically captive: “We can help you.” They were supposed to rendezvousat the church to discuss, but Alaric Saltzman (Matthew Davis) staked Logan before he got there.You intrigue me, Mr. Saltzman, and not just because you called the Mayor a “full-grown alpha male douchebag”when he took his son Tyler outside to fight Jeremy like a real man. P.S. Is Tyler turning into a werewolf? Is that why he said he doesn’t know what’s wrong with him in front of a full moon after having another fit of aggression? And why he enjoys drawing freaky s— like Jeremy, who was inspired to get out his sketch pad after seeing a family journal filled with demon-looking creatures from the 1800s?
Stefan and Elena had sex: It wasn’t a dream. Elena really told Stefan that she loved him. He really turned around, stared at her with a look of surrender, then walked over and without a word, kissed her hard. They really ended up in bed. I really ended up pausing the scene repeatedly because my brother-in-law kept walking by the living room, and I felt like a 13-year-old getting busted for watching something she shouldn’t. Elena could handle Stefan’s vampire face, and the awkwardness of asking a vampire if he, too, was thirsty postcoital, but she couldn’t deal with how much she looked like Katherine in the photo she found while snooping around Stefan’s bedroom in his shirt. She left her necklace, sped off, hit something in the middle of the road, and flipped her vehicle. The shot of whatever it was getting up and walking toward her was the spookiest image on the show to date. AWESOME. Any theories as to what it is? (If you’ve read the books and it sounds familiar, no spoilers, unless you mark your comment with the word SPOILER!)
Caroline and Matt: Matt continued to be Mr. Decent. After Tyler gave him crap for looking chummy with Caroline, Matt finally told him he wouldn’t apologize for liking her. “So stop your little bromance bitch act.” Tyler had no comeback. Do not make me have to start to like Tyler…
Your turn. What did you think of the episode?
Photo credit: Quantrell Colbert/The CW
Ian Somerhalder, Nina Dobrev, and Paul Wesley star in the CW’s romance-infused vampire soap opera.