By Whitney Pastorek
November 17, 2009 at 10:39 PM EST

I was at the grocery store buying a last minute present for a friend’s birthday party a couple weekends ago — what? it was on the way to the restaurant! — and while perusing the gift cards, I happened to notice the ugliest goddamn bottles of wine I’d ever seen, like someone had slapped a totes-hids Ed Hardy sweatshirt on a defenseless chardonnay and then jacked the price up by $20. Upon closer examination, it was just as I feared: Christian Audigier, a.k.a. The Dude Who Makes Those Totes-Hids Ed Hardy Sweatshirts, has branched out into wine, covering the bottles with skulls and roses and panthers and all the other symbols of rampant ‘Oughts douchebaggery we’ve come to know and love thanks to such fine role models as Jon Gosselin and Bret Michaels. The wine actually has a MySpace page. If this were a sketchy club, I think the wine would be hitting on us. And when you think about it, this idea is not so bad. Hell, I bought a bottle. (Joke purchase = still a purchase.)

And that’s not all from the intersection of music culture and fermented grapes! Today’s inbox played host to not one but two press releases featuring ways for us common folk to make our wine racks rawk. Read on!

First and perhaps most obviously there are Wines That Rock, three new brews from the Mendocino Wine Co. “blending one-of-a-kind wines with rock n’ roll mythology”: “Forty Licks Merlot,” “Woodstock Chardonnay” and “The Dark Side of the Moon Cabernet Sauvignon.” Yes, in fact, it does sound like something your dad would drink, but the company is carbon neutral (yay!) and the labels — featuring legendary album art — are kinda cool, so long as you don’t think too much about what, say, Mick Jagger tastes like.

Meanwhile, for the younger generation, there’s Wine DJ, a promotional iPhone app designed to get you to think Liberty School Wines are awesome. Once downloaded to your iPhone, the app will help you build a playlist based on your “mood, setting, and which Liberty School wine you’re drinking.” The playlists are streamed via Grooveshark, and the example one on the site features songs from the Raconteurs, Billy Joel, Brian Eno, and the Strokes, plus Rod Stewart’s “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy,” which makes it seem like the Liberty School Wines might be hitting on us, too.

What do you think, Mixers? Does any of this pique your interest? Is there a rock n’ roll-related wine product that you’d care to recommend? (Me, I wanna know what’s in those bottles Vedder’s always drinking.) Leave it in the comments. And don’t forget to follow us on Twitter at @EWMusicMix!

More from’s Music Mix:

Miley Cyrus on ‘Twilight’: ‘I’ve never seen it, nor will I ever’

Jack White to produce Queen of Rockabilly Wanda Jackson’s next album

Bob Dylan’s ‘Must Be Santa’: New Christmas classic or ‘Animaniacs’ homage?

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