Best Movie Title Punctuation Marks: Go!

Today is National Punctuation Day, the most important non-religious nerd holiday that doesn’t involve talking like a pirate. Just think how different our lives would be without the comma, not to mention the semi-colon; we’d be lost without the period. Or the exclamation point! What about the question mark? (Seriously, we’d be screwed: see here.) To celebrate, we’ve assembled a list of our favorite punctuation marks in movie titles. Call them the Punctuaties (pronounced ”Punk-shoe-Ay-shees” [on second thought, don’t call them anything]).

Best use of a comma in a bad movie by a great director

White Hunter, Black Heart

Lust, Caution

Best use of a comma in a great movie by a great director

Sex, Lies, and Videotape

One, Two, Three

Best use of a comma in the weirdest movie ever:

O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Best use of a possessive apostrophe:

Schindler’s List

Jacob’s LadderAdam’s RibPrizzi’s Honor

Ocean’s 11

Best use of a colon:

Dr. Strangelove: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America For Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

Best phrase to add after a colon in a movie title:

Tokyo Drift

Worst phrase to add after a colon in a movie title:

At World’s End

Best sincere use of an exclamation point:

I Know Where I’m Going!

I Want To Live!

Best sarcastic use of an exclamation point:

Airplane!

The Informant!

Best use of an exclamation point, period:

Anvil! The Story of Anvil

Colons that failed to build a franchise:

Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World

Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

I don’t know, but I’m sure the movie will tell me:

What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?

Who’s Afraid of the Virginia Woolf?

2009 loves the ampersand:

Angels & Demons

Julie & Julia

Fast & Furious

Our funny friends, the ellipses:

With a Friend like Harry…

If…

Waiting…

Promising Signs that the Era of the Colon is ending:

Star Trek

The Dark KnightThe Final Destination

Terminator Salvation

Less promising signs that the Era of the Colon is just beginning:

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs

Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Is the ”500” silent?

(500) Days of Summer

Best use of a period, non-abbreviation:

I’m Not There.

Best use of a period, abbreviation:

L.I.E.

Spielberg, you already abbreviated it!

E.T. The Extraterrestrial

A.I. Artificial Intelligence

Best mathematical use of a slash:

8 1/2

9 1/2 Weeks

Best nonsensical use of a slash:

Face/Off

Three ways to write the worst title ever

Star Wars: Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace

Star Wars – Episode 1: The Phantom Menace

Star Wars: Episode 1: The Phantom Menace

Goodbye, Comma:

Goodbye, Mr. Chips

Goodbye, Columbus

Goodbye, Lenin!

Honorable Mention for Creative Use of Asterisks:

M*A*S*H

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Make up your own categories in the comments!