Today is National Punctuation Day, the most important non-religious nerd holiday that doesn’t involve talking like a pirate. Just think how different our lives would be without the comma, not to mention the semi-colon; we’d be lost without the period. Or the exclamation point! What about the question mark? (Seriously, we’d be screwed: see here.) To celebrate, we’ve assembled a list of our favorite punctuation marks in movie titles. Call them the Punctuaties (pronounced ”Punk-shoe-Ay-shees” [on second thought, don’t call them anything]).
Best use of a comma in a bad movie by a great director
White Hunter, Black Heart
Lust, Caution
Best use of a comma in a great movie by a great director
Sex, Lies, and Videotape
One, Two, Three
Best use of a comma in the weirdest movie ever:
O Brother, Where Art Thou?
Best use of a possessive apostrophe:
Schindler’s List
Jacob’s LadderAdam’s RibPrizzi’s Honor
Ocean’s 11
Best use of a colon:
Dr. Strangelove: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America For Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
Best phrase to add after a colon in a movie title:
Tokyo Drift
Worst phrase to add after a colon in a movie title:
At World’s End
Best sincere use of an exclamation point:
I Know Where I’m Going!
I Want To Live!
Best sarcastic use of an exclamation point:
Airplane!
The Informant!
Best use of an exclamation point, period:
Anvil! The Story of Anvil
Colons that failed to build a franchise:
Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World
Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever
I don’t know, but I’m sure the movie will tell me:
What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?
Who’s Afraid of the Virginia Woolf?
2009 loves the ampersand:
Angels & Demons
Julie & Julia
Fast & Furious
Our funny friends, the ellipses:
With a Friend like Harry…
If…
Waiting…
Promising Signs that the Era of the Colon is ending:
Star Trek
The Dark KnightThe Final Destination
Terminator Salvation
Less promising signs that the Era of the Colon is just beginning:
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs
Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
Is the ”500” silent?
(500) Days of Summer
Best use of a period, non-abbreviation:
I’m Not There.
Best use of a period, abbreviation:
L.I.E.
Spielberg, you already abbreviated it!
E.T. The Extraterrestrial
A.I. Artificial Intelligence
Best mathematical use of a slash:
8 1/2
9 1/2 Weeks
Best nonsensical use of a slash:
Face/Off
Three ways to write the worst title ever
Star Wars: Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace
Star Wars – Episode 1: The Phantom Menace
Star Wars: Episode 1: The Phantom Menace
Goodbye, Comma:
Goodbye, Mr. Chips
Goodbye, Columbus
Goodbye, Lenin!
Honorable Mention for Creative Use of Asterisks:
M*A*S*H
61*
Make up your own categories in the comments!
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