'Big Brother' finale mini-recap: We have a winner!

Can Big Brother really be all over? But I just learned the proper syntax for, “You got got!” and now I can’t use it anymore! I guess, in a sense, I got got. Oh, the irony! It was tough to figure out who to root for in tonight’s finale, what with all the strong players gone. It was Battle of the Coattails, so it came down to, who hung on harder? (SPOILER A-COMIN’, IN CASE YOU HAVEN’T WATCHED YET…)

And apparently, the Queen of the Coattails was Jordan. Now, she was the sentimental favorite, and I was hoping she’d find a way to win, but now that it’s happened, I don’t feel good about it. I was of the “Anybody But Natalie” school until the bitter end (it was appropriate that she was playing with Saran Wrap when, after Jordan won round two of the HOH competition, Natalie told her that they should be BFFs: like her offer of friendship, the plastic wrap was transparent). And yet, all of Jordan’s answers to the jury were incoherent and rambling, and gave no evidence that she had anything to do with getting to the final two. At least Natalie could express a strategy. All Jordan could express was her desire to extract her shorts.

I couldn’t bring myself to root for Natalie, and yet I can’t bring myself to revel in her loss. There was no good choice here (I’d have felt better about Kevin), just a sentimental one. But I think we all know who the big winner was tonight: Jeff, who was on fire with his jabs at Lydia. Can we keep that going three times a week?

For a more coprehensive look at the show’s end, check out my full TV Watch covering the full week’s worth of BB.