Andy Rooney fixed his sights last night on an issue plaguing our nation, one that haunts us and confuses us each and every day: What is the deal with fruit?

“I think we would eat more fruit if we knew it was going to be any good when we bought it,” Rooney says because total confusion is definitely the reason American diets are so effed. There are lots of serious issues about fruit, starting with OMG WTF is a papaya?!, and including the baffling concept that people work at grocery stores. “How’d you like to have the job of stacking fruit in a fruit store?” he chuckles. Also on Rooney’s radar: Lemons are “one of the great fruits,” melons are the money-sucking con-artists of the produce aisle, and green apples get DQ’d from the great fruit debate on account of being green!

Eight million people watched 60 Minutes last night, PopWatchers. We could marvel at that fact alone, but instead, we choose to spin this story forward in the comments section by asking you: What is your favorite fruit?