By Annie Barrett
Updated May 14, 2009 at 12:00 PM EDT

Who here has consumed edible gold? Was it even tasty? Did the experience have any redeeming qualities besides the fleeting assurance that yes, you are wealthy? The question is relevant because Colbert did a $3,000 dine-and-dash on last night’s Report, and his final stop was NYC’s Serendipity for the Golden Opulence Sundae. Press play below.

A thousand-dollar shaved lobster and caviar pizza is stupid, but fine, because that is FOOD. Edible gold is almost as useless as these gold pills that make your poop glitter or Lindsay Bluth’s diamond powder cream from Arrested Development. Just down a bottle of Goldschlager for dessert and call it a night.