By Mandi Bierly
Updated April 03, 2009 at 12:00 PM EDT

Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark, the Broadway-bound show with music and lyrics by Bono and The Edge, is holding open casting calls in the following cities:

Orlando, FL: Thursday, April 9
New York, NY: Monday, April 13
Los Angeles, CA: Saturday, April 18
Seattle, WA: Monday, April 20
Chicago, IL: Thursday, May 7
Austin, TX: Wednesday, May 27

I am not the Mary Jane they are looking for: “Female. 16-20’s. Beautiful girl next door. Strong pop/rock singing voice required.” (I’m 33.) But their Peter Parker could be the man I’m looking for: “Male. 16-20’s. Must have a great rock tenor voice. Can be nerdy with understated sex appeal and a good sense of humor.” Will these funny, hot geeks (term of endearment, people) be lined up outside American Idol audition-style, in which case I’m suddenly planning a long, lurking lunch, or are Broadway productions more civilized than that and these men will gathered indoors?

Producers, by the way, are also searching for “Lead female villian”: “Female. [I love that they felt the need to clarify.] 25-35 years old. All ethnicities encouraged. Must have an amazing rock voice. Think Sinead O’Connor with a Middle Eastern/Bulgarian/Greek twist. Foreign and/or world music types are great. Foreign accents are great.” Discuss. Is “amazing” theater code for “she gets the showstopper,” sorry, “great”-sounding Peter and “strong” Mary Jane?