1. Jessica Simpson, Cindy McCain show up at the same NASCAR race
And wearing the same Dale Earnhardt Jr. tee! Awkward!
2. Ashley Tisdale says autograph seekers push napkins under her stall door in public restrooms
Polls suggest 48% of HSM fans spend 67% of their time in public restrooms.
3. Tara Reid says she’ll go back to acting once the strike is over
Sadly, the strike will never end. Right, everyone in Tara Reid’s vicinity? Riiiiight??
4. Angelina only planned to adopt, but Brad made her want to get pregnant
”He seemed like a good earner. He seemed like he had prospects.”
5. Star Jones is ”ready to love, 24/7”
She is the Jack Bauer of lovin’. Phone anytime. She has a call center in Bangalore. Also, very little to do.
6. Sharon Osbourne compares Botox-denier Nicole Kidman’s large, smooth forehead to ”a f—ing flat-screen TV”
”I would love to watch f—ing Gossip Girl on that f—ing forehead,” she went on, ”I’ll bet it would be f—ing crystalline!”
7. After offending David Letterman, John McCain appears on Late Show
His worst moment: trying to lead the Letterman audience in an unfunny ”Uma/Obama” chant.
8. Mark Wahlberg doesn’t think Andy Samberg’s SNL impersonation of him is very funny
He’d like Tina Fey to take a swing at it.
9. In London, Miley Cyrus has ”already fallen in love with 20 guys”
It’s not as impressive as it seems: British boys come in bargain packs of 10, now that the banks have been nationalized.
10. TV’s Marcia Brady says she once blew an audition for Spielberg because she was high
I’m starting to think The Brady Bunch was some kind of government experiment in sadness.