Which is the most shocking detail of this “Ryan Seacrest: “I Was Bit by a Shark!” news brief?

a) Bad grammar (bitten, Ryan, bitten! SJP would be horrified)
b) All signs point to Ryan Seacrest probably getting his hair wet
c) Article likely originally conceived as straight-up Advil ad (Naturally, Seacrest mentioned the need for the brand-name analgesic while describing the incident on his morning radio show)
d) Bite not incurred on a Manhattan-based Shark Week buggy

(Seacrest is okay, by the way. “It was like finding a splinter!”)

addCredit(“Seacrest: Jeffrey Mayer/WireImage”)