It’s National Cellphone Courtesy Month, and my cellphone, Mr. Bilbo, which I’d had since like 2000 (named after a Kids in the Hall sketch, not Baggins), celebrated by going AWOL last week just long enough for me to think that I’d lost him. He knew that would be the only way I’d actually get off my butt and replace him. (I searched for him for two days before I agreed to upgrade. After I made the purchase, I found him on my kitchen floor.) While my friends initially thanked Mr. Bilbo for his sacrifice, some of them might now be having second thoughts. I’d never texted before I got this phone (ever), and I went a little finger-happy over the weekend. Apparently, I misjudged who needed to know asap that I’d just seen Tom Cavanaugh (pictured) on the street.

Me: Just saw tom cavanaugh on 8th ave. Heart him. At least he didn’t see me twist my ankle. That happened well before then. Jim gaffigan almost got to see that.
Michael Slezak: Whose number is this?
Me: Lol. Mandi’s.
Slezak: You have a text prob…

I guess these first few weeks will be trial and error as I figure out my friends’ individual text styles. (Celeb sighting + possible humiliation isn’t worthy for everyone?) From now on, I will only expect my friend Eva to receive any and all texts from me without complaint. We never judge one another. Some texts she’s sent me: “Paradise Hotel marathon yesterday — missed the first half. Boo!” and “Just rode the elevator with Janice Dickinson.”

So, what are the rules you follow? (You will never catch me texting during a movie — how do people not realize that the light on the phone is distracting?) And what is the stupidest pop culture-related text you’ve sent? Granted, I’ve only got a week’s worth to choose from, but I’m going to go with either “Watching I survived a japanese game show. They’re gonna do the velcro wall. Yes!” or “Reading free copy of us mag. Did we know that your dave navarro is dating rock of love’s daisy? How do we feel about that?”

addCredit(“Tom Cavanaugh; Ryan Born/WireImage”)