In honor of Samantha Who?‘s return tonight (ABC, 9:30 p.m. EDT) with the first of six new episodes, I phoned Barry Watson and asked him to help me dissect his long, crazy career. (Translation: I spent two days tracking down a photo of him in the 1996 made-for-TV movie Co-Ed Call Girl, because that’s when his hair was “really flowin’ good.”) I hadn’t read a lot of interviews with Watson, so I was worried that he wouldn’t think having Baywatch on his resumé was as fabulous as I do. But I was wrong: He had just the right amount of pride in his voice when he explained that he was the first person to ever drown on the show. (Watch that episode promo.) He was also happy to talk about getting waxed for Sorority Boys. If you need another rationalization for your crush on Watson, here’s a final offering: The only costar he mentioned having a crush on was Helen Mirren during the filming of Teaching Mrs. Tingle. “There’s a scene where I’m getting manipulated by Mrs. Tingle, and that to me was a real sexy scene,” he said (watch it below). “Helen kept kinda rubbing her foot on my leg, and I was like, Oh God, I’ve got a crush on this woman. Helen Mirren is like the sexiest woman on the planet to me. She is. Just the way she goes about everything — she’s just sexy as all hell. Taylor Hackford [Mirren’s husband] is a very lucky man. That’s all I can say.” Good boy.