By Marc Bernardin
October 30, 2007 at 09:51 PM EDT

Tell me, do you like movies? Do you really like movies? How about lifting weights? Well, the new 90-disc United Artists 90th Anniversary Prestige Collection Gift Set is the product you’ve been weighting for! (The puns… they never stop.) Coming in at a hefty 22.5 lbs (as verified by an elaborate series of experiments involving 10 DVDs and my bathroom scale) and costing a coronary-inducing $869.98, the set boasts an assortment of MGM/UA’s classic flicks of the past almost-century.

As for which films are in this boulder of a box, the selection is puzzling. While you get a whole mess of undeniable classics — like Some Like it Hot, West Side Story, The Manchurian Candidate, Dr. No, The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, Midnight Cowboy, Rocky, Raging Bull, Leaving Las Vegas, and Hotel Rwanda — there are a couple of puzzlers. Instead of giving us, say, Goldfinger, we get Dalton’s Bond dud, The Living Daylights? Does one need both Red Dawn and Road House? And does anyone truly need to watch Baby Boom again?

Hey, if you’ve got almost a grand lying around and nothing better to spend it on, go for it. Then again, you could also buy a crapbox car… that could, you know, take you places.