By Leah Greenblatt
Updated October 05, 2007 at 12:00 PM EDT

He is no longer trapped! The closet has been busted wide open! Mr. R Kelly has some talk to give you, and it is very, very REAL, ladies and gentlemen. The latest clip from the inimitable urban bard showcases, once again, the scatological poetry that flows from his mind like a river of, well, something brown.

We can’t decide what we love/despise best: Is it the fuzzy slippage of side ponytail? The sweatshirt that appears to have been borrowed from the DeBarge family archives? The fact that Kelly believes paying for a lady to get her “hair, toes and nails done” entitles him to speak rudely to said lady? Please, dear readers, help us make up our minds, or offer your own take. Warning: the language is super not safe for work, so cubicle monkeys, take heed: