By Annie Barrett
Updated January 19, 2007 at 04:00 PM EST
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I’d buy a crate of pickles ‘n’ cream popsicles from this fiiiine man.

Who is this stud selling Schick razors in a 1980 commercial? Take your time guessing, if you even need to, which you shouldn’t. Answer is after the jump.

Hell yeah, Alan Dale! Before becoming America’s favorite controlling family patriarch (on The O.C., Lost, and Ugly Betty) and a way cooler vice president than Dick Cheney (on 24),the native New Zealander worked his way up from shilling personal grooming products on Australian TV. I think we need a list of everythingawesome about this video.

1. He had hair! Oh, it is luscious. If that woman/prop could glimpsethe future, I bet she’d be dry- shampooing those beautiful curlsinstead of lazily fingering his jawline. (That, by the way, happens tobe number 2.)

3. The way the woman/prop semi-knowingly nods after Alan asks “Youever notice when you shave, how the blades get clogged?” Boy, does sheever! Puffing out her lips, duck-like, only adds to her authority.

4. That bitchin’ piano music at the beginning. Where’d it go? Come back!

5. The guy shaving totally isn’t Alan.

6. Push clean blades. Push clean blades. Push clean blades. How am I not sick of this grammatically nonsensical phrase yet?

7. Worst. Diagram. Ever!

Guess Who!

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