The 10 hottest topics for the week of December 8, 2006

By Scott Brown
December 01, 2006 at 05:00 AM EST

Scott Brown’s Hit List

LED {1}] Bruce Lee theme park planned It’ll be family-themed: Families will fight other families to the death for the pleasure of a reclusive crime lord. And prizes.

2 Kazakh novelist thinks Borat deserves his country’s prestigious cultural award He says it will be presented behind the Almaty KFC, and Sacha Baron Cohen should come alone.

3 Elton John leaves stage to vomit Even he’s sick of ”Crocodile Rock.”

4 Charlie Sheen auctions Marlon Brando apology note Sheen’s apology-note collection is considered the most comprehensive in L.A., though most, it should be said, are written by him.

5 Lucasfilm files suit against unauthorized lightsabers If you choose to wield one, Lucasfilm will not be held liable for the effects, which may include long-term virginity.

6 Dan Aykroyd now making wine ‘Wine Spectator’ calls his ‘Blues Brothers 2000’ ”extraneous, with notes of desperation.”

7 David Blaine escapes from spinning gyroscope Imagine if Blaine used his powers for Evil instead of Irrelevant.

8 Da Vinci book prequel to become movie sequel? The filmmakers promise we’ll learn how Tom Hanks acquired that scalp rat.

9 Revenge of the Nerds remake canceled Existence of God belatedly proved.

10 Peter Jackson won’t make The Hobbit Existence of God back in question.