On ''Nip/Tuck,'' lonely guy Sean and evil James both befriend a homeless man around Christmas; plus, Christian's sort-of son Wilber comes back into his life

By Tim Stack
Updated November 29, 2006 at 05:00 AM EST


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”Nip/Tuck”: Holiday giving and taking

Thanksgiving might be over, but I still feel the need to share with y’all what I’m thankful for: Nip/Tuck appears to be fully back on the rails after that disastrous futuristic episode two weeks ago. Last night’s hour was comic and creepy and disturbing, all the things that make the show so much fun.

It was a fairly sad episode for poor Sean. Not only is he spending the holidays without Julia, Annie, and Conor, but even his creepy son Matt ditched him. For a Scientology cruise! What the hell is that? All I know is that I once went on a Carnival cruise when I was a kid, and that was scary enough. (It was like a floating HoJo but with disco lights.) Sean decided to numb his pain with a little alcohol, particularly in his coffee cup at work. Unfortunately, his drunkenness led to a little malpractice on a patient who required, shall I say, a delicate procedure involving a certain pleasure spot. One of my favorite moments was when the woman returned to the office to complain of having spontaneous orgasms and her vibrating phone set her off. Hilarious! Another highlight was a drunk Sean playing Santa Claus to the kids in the local mall, a favor to Liz’s rather nasty girlfriend Poppy (Alanis Morissette). I don’t know what the deal is with Poppy, but I do not like her. She just always seems pissed about something. Then Sean was caught being, um, serviced by a female elf in Santa’s workshop. Definitely not something you would see in A Christmas Story.

Christian had more reason to celebrate, as his beloved Wilber was returned to him. It seems that Wilber’s real dad passed away and stated in his will that Gina was not to have custody of him (smart move, buddy). With Wilber possibly going into foster care, Christian took in the boy, who is just about the cutest little fella ever. Even Michelle, wary of having to change diapers again (apparently Burt was a Depends guy), was charmed by the adorable tyke. The previews for upcoming episodes, however, suggest that this story is going to end tragically or sadly; Nip/Tuck doesn’t really do happy endings.

Speaking of sad, James (Jacqueline Bissett) struck once again. Sean had befriended an injured homeless man named Reefer and allowed him to spend the night at McNamara/Troy in a nice warm bed. Too bad that nice warm bed was next to a cold-hearted killer like James. She drugged old Reefer and removed his organs. Then she had Michele help her dispose of the dude’s remains. The holidays are a stressful time, but nowhere more so than in Miami, I guess.

What do you think? Does something about Poppy seem off to you too? Will James ever get caught? And what’s going to happen to Wilber?

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