The 10 hottest topics for the week of August 4, 2006
1 Colin Farrell confronted on Leno by a former phone-sex operator Fantasy aside, you really don’t want to meet any phone-sex operator in person. And if you must, do it privately, on C-SPAN.
2 Disney fires a bunch of people They’re basing the strategy on the classic Disneyland ride Layoff Mountain.
3 Ron Artest to open for Fat Joe Never have too much riding on a game of H-O-R-S-E, Fat Joe.
4 Donald Trump to get star on Walk of Fame The star will be 50 stories tall and overcompensating for something.
5 Steely Dan claims You, Me and Dupree ripped off ”Cousin Dupree” Sure sets a bad precedent for Loggins/Messina v. Clooney, in re: Peacemaker.
6 Naomi Campbell disturbs peace. Again. Hey, maybe she’s trying to tell us something. Is Timmy down the well, girl?
7 GPS now locates movie theaters Making it that much easier to avoid a late-night collision with Little Man.
8 Christy Turlington bronzed her Blackberry for Ed Burns I hope to God this isn’t a euphemism.
9 Taylor Hicks to meet Bush Bush will pressure the newly elected Idol to abandon his destabilizing dance spasms.
10 Keira Knightley says she squeezes her zits Apropos of nothing, Oprah releases a six-page treatise retorting that she does NOT squeeze hers, but if she did, she would tell us.