By Scott Brown
Updated May 23, 2006 at 12:00 PM EDT

It’s not the most covered song on earth — that would be the Beatles’ “Yesterday,” according to Guinness (the book, not the beer — I blog sober nowadays). Nevertheless, Joy Division’s “Love Will Tear Us Apart” does appear to be the key to a band’s success, according to a compelling theory from an Indiana gentleman. He’s assembled quite a trove of “Love” covers from Calexico to U2/Arcade Fire to 10,000 Maniacs to Hawksley Workman. (I’ve linked my favorites.) Covering this song, according to “Dodge,” is the key to indie-rock success — that and having a cute girl on bass or keyboard. Or guitar. Or vocals. Or anywhere near the stage.

This is comforting. I now understand why my garage band never took off. Incidentally, here’s a clip of us performing. (I’m the really masculine one.)